Cate

Biting The Bullet

by Cate

Wednesday 15th September 2010 6:56 pm (first posted Saturday 4th September 2010 5:58 am)

I do not want to know

Don’t tell me.

I do not want to see

Don`t show me

I do not want to feel

Don`t make me

Please leave me

Cocooned and wombed

Numbed and dumbed

Safe and secure

In my candy floss

Detached, two point two

World.

Happy happy clappy clappy

World.

Do not shoot the bullet

Which will shatter

The walls of my dreams

The poison tipped

Barbed wire bullet

Which will tear down

The fragile walls

Of my sanity

Pierce my flesh

Rend my sinews

Freeze my blood

Explode my brain

With pain.

Do not make me feel

The silent scream

That will rise, inside

And splinter me

Into a thousand pieces.

Do not make me face

The empty space

As it ricochets endlessly

Around soundless rooms.

Soon Soon

I will bite down . Hard.

But not yet.

Not yet.

bullet

◄ Pandora`s Box

Under The Stairs ►

Comments

Yvonne Brunton

Fri 4th May 2012 18:12

Bite the bullet. Face up to our worst apprehensions. This piece is so emotive (and I've been there and it was just like this)Are you writing from personal experience?
Not sure whether 'I enjoyed it' is quite the right expession - it certainly touched a raw point in me.XX

<Deleted User> (9186)

Fri 18th Mar 2011 18:40

Biting the bullet seems a good idea considering what's in store!!

chris yates

Thu 23rd Sep 2010 14:53

safe and secure in my candy floss.detached,two point two world such a vulnerable line...love it

Cynthia Buell Thomas

Fri 10th Sep 2010 16:02

Cate, I'm finally back to you. Dave and Isobel covered my reactions eloquently.
I did find myself making my own stanzas. The first idea seemed to be assertions of 'I do not want..' up to ' ....clappy World'. Then you grip the real subject with the metaphor of 'bullet' and you beg not to be physically tortured using 'bullet' imagery, deliberately excessive. Next is 'the silent scream' section with its emotional 'soundless spaces'. And finally, you assert your realism again, recognizing the inevitable circumstances, but begging only for more time. It is really well-structured; the 'stanzas' idea just helped me to appreciate it.

The kids are leaving home, or some such?

Francine

Mon 6th Sep 2010 05:08

You express well the imminent doom that brings about apprehensive feelings.

Rachel McGladdery

Sun 5th Sep 2010 12:18

Cate, this is so moving. You really feel the pain when reading. fab poem
xxx

Lynn Dye

Sun 5th Sep 2010 09:21

This is just so good, Cate, well done. xx

<Deleted User> (7073)

Sun 5th Sep 2010 00:35

A good themed poem, powefully descriptive in its delivery, I think nobody would like to bite this piece of ordnance XX

Isobel

Sat 4th Sep 2010 09:03

This is absolutely brilliant Cate. Stylistically much more contemporary than your usual stuff - I love it.
From an emotional point of view it is heart breaking - made me cry in fact - but then I have been up half the night as well...
I know it must have been hard for you to write this. I should comment on the poetry - there is too much to say. I like the repetition at the beginning. I like the idea of empty space ricocheting round (strange we should have both chosen to use that unusual word!, I also love the ending - the short sentences - the repetition, the overwhelming sadness and denial it evokes.
I'm done. x

Dave Bradley

Sat 4th Sep 2010 07:56

I've kept you up all night? You know what people will say - WOL being WOL.

Joking aside,Cate,this is really really good. It's the best poetic description I personally have ever seen of the universal human experience of being in denial. It's going to be an interesting competition

PS get some kip! xx

Cate Greenlees

Sat 4th Sep 2010 06:01

I cannot believe Ive been up all night doing this Dave!!! But when youve gotta write youve gotta write.Ive had somewhat of a literary wasteland recently.... thanks for getting my literary flow going again!Cate xx

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