To have loved how we loved

 Eyes locked, skin tender

To have loved how we loved 

Hands clasped, lips traced 

To have loved how we loved 

Sea of brown, sea of blue 

To have loved how we loved 

Bodies ignited, spirits calm

To have loved how we loved 

Unsung harmony, fragile peace 

To have loved how we loved 

Hidden darkness, returning comfort...

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You're a big girl 

With every decision you make

You don't waver in front of people 

With the choices you've made 

You stand your ground 

With a smile or one turned upside down 

And you're outspoken when bystanders look away

Sugar, spice and everything nice 

Is not all what you're made of 

Your sweet and sourness gives you power 

That keeps you from going the wrong way

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I pull the black dagger

From my heart

The weight of my armour

Now a fluid mercury 

Not a poison to me 

A release 

I steep to one knee

Chest free

A pour of soft gold down your slender arm

Sheds the silver mercury away 

Fills the wound that I 

Cast upon myself 

Your fingers brush me

As though they are lillies in my garden of Eden 

Lustful inhale of...

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dear diary,

I am 40. And Im just now starting to find my footing. or a new footing. there's so much change that it's difficult to tell. But, love always has been and always will be the main plot of my life's story. Sadly it seems, though, that no matter how ferverently I emote what love is to me; how deeply, purely, selflessly I love, I am met with an abundance of resistance and find myself los...

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Swirling thoughts

causing chaos in my head

Leaving destruction in its path

Debris consisting of my past 

Left scattered

Left broken

My head filled with TV-like static

Never staying on one show

Never giving me the time 

To appreciate the little things 

The plots

The characters

Somehow something calmed the storm

Someone 

Even if it's for a bri...

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my eyes did give worship
to every hint of olive on his skin.
I whisper a Hail Mary
and surrender 
to the kiss of another bullet.

his armor, amatory.
mine, antiquated.
pray,
prey.

a pair of tangled beasts
never knew such beauty.
 

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When will it go away?

The pain in my chest

Pain in my stomach

Pain. 

It’s repetitive and never stops

It creeps up on me like bugs

Stings like a wasp

Bites like a mosquito

And leaves, taking a small part of me

Some say it’s a part of life 

Maybe I don’t want that

If this is life 

Maybe I don’t want any p...

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at times I find myself
with insight
into my third eye
the inward perception
of crystalline tears
holding onto emotions
looking for one thing

The truth

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my love letter
stamped with a pair of pressed lips
licked,
then sealed with a kiss

the silent observer.
waiting for his moment
with the present

trying quietly not to mouth breathe aloud
smothered in your undergarments

while fire from the two flames
arose
on a magic candle
over and over

like a brazier come undone

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star dust -
quantum particles —

and, strings ...
from the fabric of the universe

ashes to ashes,
A bindi
black glasses,
fragmented obsidian
and, an asteroid belt

A Shero
— deified
hereafter she received
Saturn’s ring.

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You know what ?
they say,
three lefts make a right.

I’ll go ahead
and, uh…
double back around

now, where were we

we’re here

Where?

There.

well.. then,
why didn’t you just tell me that in the first place

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you need to
... stop
ignoring ...
the warning signs to
turn around your life

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This just in
The faulty firing pin — from a fire arm
had become dislodged
effectively,
causing it to misfire

very briefly …
in acceptance of all responsibility
the city-state committee
has sent a representative
that will be answering questions

now… back to you

in other news
we have a sunny forecast

there’s a color shader
right there, on
this heat map
that has an infrared si...

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it is in the safety of the charred night,
one whose stars have been hand plucked
from the sky,
that I observe myself
in an infinite bliss.

the cosmos purr this sacred psalm of wonder,
this fresh breath of a new love
spilling from my lips
sets fog from core.

I thrust myself to the sky
time and time again,
and time again.
this precious consequence
leaves me 
numb and hungry
for an...

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to grieve is to know love intimately.

to pluck his voice from a crowd,
though I've not heard it in years.
to reminisce about my fingertips
reading his calloused hands like braille
and finding my next breath in every tactile.

to recognize any morsel of his being
in any dimension
and pledging patience to the search
in every lifetime.
to finding him.
and knowing he is ever present.

...

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Delusion. 

When delusion wears of

and finally 

you see

what u didn’t want to

for so long 

that this person

isn’t the person 

saving you 

loving you 

the only person 

able to do that 

is you 

babe.

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Soulmates. 

Do souls exist?

If they do 

I believe ours belong together.

I love u 

I know that know. 

Even after 5 years 

I still do

I will never stop.

I pray 

at night 

for this one moment 

this one second 

with you 

being able to tell you

how i feel. 

Then 

I couldn’t.

Last time I saw you

I nearly told you.

Back then 

I was with him.

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Life.

Every day.

Is one day closer

to you 

not being anymore.

Being alive 

unsure 

questioning 

doubting.

Nothing is ultimate

besides 

this 

exact 

moment. 

You can never go back 

you can wish for it 

everyday 

but you can’t 

and you never will. 

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My first time. 

It wasn’t special.

It was okay. 

That’s what I’m saying

everytime 

someone asks me.

I don’t want to say it 

it took me too long 

too long 

to realize.

You are the evil

your are the the beginning 

of me 

not feeling.

You raped me. 

I was young 

too young.

You were older 

but this 

this wasn’t very mature of you.

Not very de...

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My words emerge
from a desolate city 
that the kindly night welcomes
and in it they find their dwelling place

Words of enchantment 
never tire of sailing,
randomly searching for white clouds
or the fury of the sea

Words that beg spring
to bring peace instead of war
and write a song of forgiveness,
justice, freedom and most of all
an ode to love

Loose they go from flight to fligh...

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We are ancient hearts

A beat so strong

We are the petals of love

A touch so gentle 

We are the faintest shadows 

A dance so deft

We are the flicker of candles

A flame so gentle

We are the trace of embers

A light so dim 

We are one

A fate so destined

We are absent

A presence so cold

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A tapestry of lives gone by

Rich threads from what we cry

Frays of the past evoking

Gaze of the future corrupting

My stream carries its fallen leaves

Its purpose only defined by what it receives

Broken mind and beaten guilt

A blackened soul only I have built

Tears like beads down a porcelain doll

She is there to no longer make me whole

As I possessed a poiso...

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In the sun you hear me cry

In the moon you see me stand

I rise to your call

I fall to your mercy 

My hands rest on your knees 

My head bowed in your heart 

Too much for me

Too much for sin

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No

I refuse to

fall in love

The thrill of

the hurried air combing through my hair

And the earth rushing to meet my

anxious face

is gone now

Much like you are

No

I don't wish to fall

If the universe could

grant me one pace-altering gift

I'd wish to float

with you

like two ice cubes

emersed and indulging in

liquid joy

Never to be ...

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it's
fearful stutters
on lips with a lisp,
gaping wide open,
autopsy of the chest.

it's wretched.
and painstakingly
beautiful.

and oh, how I love it.

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I am covered in
bruises.
i love them because
they are proof
of all the times i fell...
in love.
i am covered in
scars.
i love them because
they are proof
of all the times i thought i fell...
in love
but something else was there to catch me.
i have scraped knees
from being dragged
thru life by my heart
because it moves
quicker
than my feet.

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the woodland hoarfrost dressing tendrils
 could no less love the light;
it is in this very conflict I find myself
in cavernous worship to both sides,
this delicate balance of paradox,
pirouetting on a sheet of glass,
untinged
by the busy of the world,
alive in its own concention.

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so I become this wrought iron
that I have forged with my own two hands.
I sharpen myself,
tip to hilt.
but
my mouth,
the very blade that can cut the sky,
chose to speak in a healers' tone instead.
I remind myself
of the violence it took
to become 
this gentle.
this cup of earth in my hands,
with home beneath
my fingernails.
I remind myself
what it means to be
pierced to the marrow
...

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“The pen is mightier than the sword”, it’s said,

But bitter and twisted gobs on sticks stir shit;

Mendacity’s their stock in trade; love’s bled

To death by sabre-rattling hypocrites.

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i'm always the girl youre not sure about.
people have tried to make me
the girl you come back for.
but i want to be the girl
you never left.

and there are gaps in my happiness.
gaps in my teeth.
gaps in between breaths.
air, just...
slipping away.
fading away 
like colors on clothes
that have spent too much time
in the sun.

and what a funny way to say
theres always light in my l...

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I love the warmth of rain in summertime,

It's so nice and pleasant in any clime.

I love the golden autumn when it dances blues,

When I let my imagination loose.

I love the whiteness of the snow when winter comes,

I don't feel any cold when I am in your arms.

But when the blossom of the spring comes

I'll overcome the oceans, mountains, and seas

And on the wings of love,...

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