I now feel the 
 empty, 
  unblossomed
   stem 
    of creativity
     with the lonesomeness 
      of orginality.

A duality of stunted growth
Which deems me imperfect 
               like you.

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My heart over powers my head lately

Must be linked to my stomach

I'm always feeling sick

Things changed

My person has opened up

I've been shut down for so long

I require drastic change

Shame is what I'm swimming in

I don’t feel guilty I just hate

Knowing how you are going to look at me

I never know what you think

I feel like you will just settle with me

Instead ...

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I understand, I know.

When you look at me

I'm not much else but a ghost.

That needs to let go…

Not everything you've done to me

I've been trying so hard to fix my problems

I've turned are lives into one

Its not you

Understand this for me

You work hard for your girls

I understand I'm disappointing

My words hurt I know

I wish you could see the dark place

F...

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brittle 'no' like a teather,

riotous blood and dead weather, 

steam and cog alike in Congress,

emulations of embrace, flipped sideways,

handshakes of covered mouths and scared, streaking mascara: 

dyed sensuous, brimming with ruin and ruse.

regret: 'baby won't you be my muse?' 

cold, deep as dark

spreading, sprawling climax

in a wardrobe of betrayed memories

stin...

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