Is there no hope of returning

Homesick

Relative happiness is nice

A ping in my brain

A twinge in my heart

These pulses of ice in my veins

Never want to stop

Every moment distracted

You're there

Crying

Please, please don't cry

Every attempt to want to understand

You help

Another wall is slammed down between us 

Please don't push me away

I can be goo...

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With each and every prose I think of new things to outpour onto this page. Ideas and feelings flow through me, conflicting, and most of the time I am ok.

I've been sober since then; nothing helps this anymore. Every day starts out slow, in a haze, then I feel ok and content and myself for a few hours. Once noon rolls around, my heart hurts, my stomach turns, my head spins, and I leave class to ...

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How are you?
What are you thinking about?
Why are you thinking that?
Where does your heart go?
Does your soul fly?
Can you see clearly?
Did it help?
What didn't help?
How is your soul?
How is your heart?
What do you think about?
How are you?

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HA! I guess I haven't changed since then. All these schemes and dreams in my head of me doing something impossible to win you back. Wrong choice of words. To open you to me once more.

Once I daydreamt that I somehow got in touch with Al Barr and we went drinking up in Edmonton at your favorite bar every day for a week until you strolled in. You were star struck, Al was a cool wingman, you fell ...

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A promise to you,

if you are willing.

You and I are worth it

No, that's not right

We are ALL worth it

We are all worth the work

and with that work divided

the load is lighter

I would love to meet her

I would love to love her

To see what you see in her

Because I know it's pure and right for you

She is wonderful

I know she is already

There's one thing w...

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I can feel you from so far away

Suffering in silence

Asking my patience that I gladly give

Your happiness is more important.

My love is strong, my mind is weak

Yet for you, I would put my own

Stress aside if it meant helping you.

My body, mind, and soul are yours

When you need them.

I love you in every sense on the word.

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I still scroll your page

Keeping my distance

I cry, but not because I'm hurt

My tears are for you

My hope is for you

My person is better for loving you

So for that, if that person isn't me for you

Acceptance is necessary

You are my life, my soul, my love

I never cared if others are in your life

As long as they made you happy

I guess I'm just sad

That I can no lo...

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Home

Keep finding bits and pieces of

Myself strewn across my mind

Only to be blown away again

And what little pieces I have left

Shake and shiver in fear.

Knowing the horizon has better days

I strive onward, searching

There will always be a place

Not a hole, but a safe space

In my heart

For you to rest your head awhile

And know that I will always love you.

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