Rest time at bed time is not always the best time 

When I can't sleep.. they say to count sheep 

 

But my sheep don't help me  they keep me awake 

My eyes scared to close incase my soul they take 

I know it's an exercise to rest one's mind

My sheep in my head are not very kind 

 

I try to count them jump as they say 

Some of them run in the opposite way 

 

Some are...

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Reason suggests that I should function.

This world doesn’t sleep and nor do I.

Reason brings me false assumptions:

my reason sees reasons to lie.

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Dreams play hide-and-seek,

Thoughts trying to catch my sleep

Caught, but nightmares creep.

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gets up in the night to cry

my sleep is being disturbed

wont tell me why but these

disruptions must be curbed

 

I find her downstairs in tears

hugging herself as if in pain

last night it took three hours

I dont want to see it again

 

in her eyes a degree of guilt

something preys on her mind

deep-rooted fits of remorse

as if for someone she pined

 

what ...

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Insomniac

 

The floorboards above

Crack like rheumatic bones

Late at night

The house groans

And wind whispers

Through the open windows

 

The curtains open

The lights out

The darkness presses

Against the window

A streetlight drops

White light on the path

 

I can see a pale moon

Crawling through the trees

A cat sashays

Beneath the porch opposi...

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There have been numerous occasions where I'd have to close my eyes to stop from crying 

Watery; blurry; black 

Nights without you are sleepless 

But I'm pretty sure you can sleep just fine 

Even if you prefer another next to you, it's not that you prefer me

 

I could count the stars all night, but I'd still never sleep

And maybe I'd always blame insomnia for being the lack of ...

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My absent comrade

 

A fickle and inconstant friend,

of whom I rarely see enough.

It’s within you my dreams reside

but without you, I feel rough.

 

You’re absent when I need you most,

then sneak up on me, unexpected.

Can’t you see, you’re broken and disjointed

when I need you to be connected?

 

But if we weren’t to meet again

I doubt that I could I cope.

I ...

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                                 (This is my real curse)
Insomnia a horrid curse

can't sleep can't converse

everyone in the house well away

got to be up early as well today

insomnia had it all my life 

it sucks, I am tired that's life

wish I could close and drift away

awake all night till the break of day

hubby snores so loudly each night

to try and nod I fight and figh...

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Stuttering awake
in the anxious hours
when white noise
no longer lets you sleep
In the mattress springs
a metronome
your percussive heartbeat
one thought then another
one worry trailed by the next
did what was said make sense?
was it understood
will this be good enough
impossible options
improbable odds
suddenly so awake
in the anxious hours
don’t forget
to breathe

Stuttering a...

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How I long to sleep tonight
forget these thoughts
and rest
Ease my body free 
of anxiety and worry
but the more I try
the more I fail
I fidget fast, roll in frustration
cursing my debt
and conversations that won't end
Where are those waves of darkness
when will they wash my brain
Where is that tide of sleep
of empty-headedness 
of ignorance
and bliss...

Six hours now
I've studie...

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Getting acquainted with the moon 
behind glass
we exchange so many glances
and on my back
a thousand heart-attacks roll past
My fingers beside, cross and uncross
as you sleep, so black
back in the real world
paid up entirely
on your subscription
to actual reality

O would you bring me a souvenir
from the envious depths of endless peace
perhaps a child or a patient nurse
or some cont...

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The battle begins -

Poetry behind my eyes

Will not let me sleep. 

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A midnight black sky

Seen in the bedroom mirror

By eyes that won't close

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I rely on sleep

It’s the only thing

To keep thoughts at bay

Hours when my mind

Releases its grip

That strangles my sanity

 

Now, in its own

Sick and twisted way

Keeps sleep at bay

My mind is evolving

Tightening its grip

And slaughtering my sanity

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When the night doth come, weary follows distantly. 

Toiling farther from the dawn with each passing sunset, offers not the distraction so sought out by its woeful captor.

With worried mind and worried soul and yearning for slumber. Not for rest, but for release. 

Relentless is the repeat of ruminating reasoning. Soul wrenching speculation scews sensibility, until slowly and sluggishly sle...

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Angel to ghost 
I go 
alone 
the night cold 
heavy heart torn 
rain hails bones 
brutal ache my mistake 
always alone 
always alone 
trying trying 
to go back in time 
to a place in my mind 
paradise denied 
burning inside
blue ice fire 
cracks a pain so deep 
only sounds like these 
evoke awake demons 
buried brittle knees 
signal transmits 
a radio waves 
echo cellos past 
...

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Sleepy

 

It’s late

actually it’s early

weird

brain never stops

mix between good thoughts and bad

this should be over since the end

of my drinking life 

my marriage 

my dogs life 

is this one of those nights I’ve been waiting for?

what to do…???

my best pal comes to town tomorrow

happy about that

maybe this shouldn’t be over

maybe this is just the beg...

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Insomnia.                             Intoxicating thoughts seeping through your neurons. The struggle of finding rest late at night. The path less traveled, because no light is there to guide you. Darkness becomes your greatest friend, it becomes more comfortable as the sleepless nights persist. Struggling to find peace with the war inside, metamorphosing your ordinary mind,
Into a machine of co...

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I fail at sleeping

 

in a show of unconditional accusation, the reproachful slander of your hereafter,

amongst the placid hours,

I try to be the grand man, but I shake too much

unhinged by the overreach of my skeletal height

much to the delight of every unskilled whistler

 

tough love and rougher hate interprets the shuddering motions, as my left hand lingers

over a poss...

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This must be my longest night
the moon laying its heavy light right down
this room swims in so much gossiping
conversations; always imagined and impossible

This must be my longest night
the blurred echoes of all we did ring ‘round
there’s no sleep to be had, just counting stars
and scenes replaying; rose or shit tinted now

I found the jagged edge of love
it cut right across my heaving...

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Insomnia rears its ugly head,
Like an old friend, 
now unwanted.
I stare at the clock,
Heavy eyed,
And wonder,
"Should I sleep now or later?"
For I am not sure anymore,
What is expected
Of a single man,
And I stare at this empty bed,
And miss her body,
And her warmth... And her.

 

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Alarm

The radio on your alarm switches on at 3am, 
unbeckoned.  The voice of a nighttime preacher 
speaking forgiveness onto dead waves.  It begins 
in your dreams, and only later do you realize 
his voice is not water spilling from a crack in a brick wall.  

You bring your fingers to your face, listening 
to the voice, which is not fire, telling you 
you are loved by an empty sky.  He...

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a night too quiet

yet, even in it’s silence,

not quite enough for me

now in my head those words were read

by Richard Burton

but then she came calling in the hours

when there aren’t yet enough digits on the clock

and I ignored the advice of William S Burroughs, or some other I forget,

and told her to fuck off, leave me to the monotone

test card transmission, t...

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LET SLEEP COMETH

 

Around and around the sad and dreary night spins

in my tortured world full of wakefulness.

It’s the same every time, unable to fall off the edge

into oblivion and peaceful sleep.

I feel so heavy with fatigue, like my limbs are weighted with lead,

the tablets I had an hour ago haven’t worked so what must I do now?

Suicide would be an answe...

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FRAG

In a war, conflict breeds loyalty not selfishness in your partner, not like chavy England. Basking in the illusional glow of my make believe achievements. More bad nights adding to my bank account of insomnia.

She has fortitude in strength of character. I hate my own reality. What would it of been like to go and to His Latest Flame with Bernie? My most amazing gig with a real women...

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