Got fired from my call centre job for failing the exam. Took it while doing the night shift. First I've ever done graveyard. Can't say I like it. In fact, I bloody hate night work. Unless it's in a goth club, drinking beer or grinding.

Gonna get a new job. Jimmy Boom Semtex needs beer and tattoo cash. Give him a job and let him learn. Short term memory aside, he'll do his best. Make you la...

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I'm the defective detective.

I marvel at the whiteness of frozen snow.

Left right upper leg.

Do you like beer?

No I like Ricky Gervais.

I'm inside the tumble dryer spinning in space.

Just made a hillinit bloody hooooot.

Why do I let the last 5 years drag me down?

Chained to me,

self destroying me from within.

I'm the Phantom Ray...

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LAUGHIN’ CRIMINALS

We run down the street to escape the local cops.

I went into the liquor store with my mate Arnie –

we looked around and spied that big fat gringo:

together we said, “Give us the cash, this is a stick up!”

He had no option – we were the guys with a sawn off.

Then it was off down the street with four bags of cash,

our haul for the day and an ea...

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