12 Days of Christmas

On the first day of Christmas

Bojo gave to me

Fear of a virus

Spreading rapidly.

On the second day of Christmas

Bojo gave to me

Two metre distance and

Fear of a virus

Spreading rapidly.

On the Third day of Christmas

Bojo gave to me

Hands, face & space,

Two metre distance and

Fear of a virus

Spreading rapidly.

...

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Retraining Bert

Chefing is not what it used to be

His boss called him in and explained.

'We're now on tier 3 says the edict,

and boozers like this have to close.'

'No boss, we're exempt,

like the 'Spoons have been told.

We sell grub and that's kosher

just the ale house is doomed.'

'It won't work like that lad,

the punters are scared.

And I can't serv...

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Uninvited Squatter Amerigo

Delivered disease

Dumped some beads

Did misdeeds

and had a Grand Old Party.

An incubus descended,

and Trumpeted its coarse

of groin grabbing ostentation

to degraded, deep, deceit.

When finally ejected

there remained a steaming turd,

in a lap of soiled clothing

impossible to purge.

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