https://youtu.be/03G4xNEpuPY

I interrupt this broadcast

I command your immediate attention

A few heart stopping seconds to put you in the moment

Brace yourselves

Wait to hear what follows those four chilling words

Chills on the back of your neck

I am a metaphorical figurehead of impoliteness

Gate-crashing the spotlight

Have you ever heard of a polite...

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https://youtu.be/ywbo53TwA-A

Why did you cut my toenails jagged

on the day I came out, Mum?

That night I lay awake thinking

‘Does Mum not love me anymore?’

Did you have a conversation with the scissors 

on that day I came out, Mum?

Blade stabbed my toe

Gushed with blood

You didn’t put on a bandage

Didn’t kiss it better

You can’t hoover up memo...

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JAGGED

Why did you cut my toenails jagged

on the day I came out, Mum?

That night I lay awake thinking

‘Does Mum not love me anymore?’

Did you have a conversation with the scissors 

on that day I came out, Mum?

Blade stabbed my toe

Gushed with blood

You didn’t put on a bandage

Didn’t kiss it better

You can’t hoover up memories

I breathe in...

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https://youtu.be/Qpnu2Lzl2ys

The Hare and the Tortoise

The owl and the pussycat, the porpoise and bear

The fox and hound, the tortoise and hare

One day in the Spring in the open air

In the pool for a swim went the tortoise and hare

Said the tortoise  to hare, ‘I really must ask’,

As the hare took a break from swimming on past

‘In case you are blind or simply can...

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https://youtu.be/mYoNBy5S8Xk

A pint in my local, Christmas Day ‘99

First time I looked over at Danny and thought ‘Damn, he is fine’

Playing pool with the lads, Danny-boy on my mind

Bent over the table, that peachy behind

His wife on the phone saying turkey is served

I had a burst up against him

Phwoar, his peaches were curved

Go home to your wife, to your not-so-fu...

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https://youtu.be/njZ7458X78g

Nineties football. Chelsea game

Me and Dad. Loved it same

Both loved tackle. Different name

Player’s tackle. Felt no shame

'Dad I’m gay'. Out it came

Tried to hide. Tried to tame

Downplay gay. Felt to blame

All Dad say was 'Cut it out'

People pleaser. My mate Dan

Diamond geezer with a tan

Hid his thoughts about what I am

Hi...

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The owl and the pussycat, the porpoise and bear

The fox and hound, the tortoise and hare

One day in the Spring in the open air

In the pool for a swim went the tortoise and hare

Said the tortoise  to hare, ‘I really must ask',

As the hare took a break from swimming on past

‘In case you are blind or simply can’t read

Each lane has a name correct for its speed’

Thought ...

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https://youtu.be/7C7zvPhFO9E

Juicy, juicy Gary Lucy

Sexy bloke off Hollyoaks

Cheeky chappy, chappy ways

Cute eye candy, happy gays

Straight boy Gary, gay heartthrob

Got off his kit, got out his nob

On front cover, almost nude

For Nineties gay mag Attitude

Remember when for us gay men

Now over thirty,  pre the Net

When pics more dirty, hard to get

Branded ...

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=deXfrBZHRnA

A day out with Rufus last year mid-September 
What events of the day will me and Alex remember?
 
My drawings of Rufus. As I’m turning the pages 
memories come back of day’s various stages
They show I love Rufus now I realise 
When a friend made me look how I’m drawing his eyes  

Alex, that whistle you make to get his attention 
which you us...

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T9SqjOJ2L8c

Hot guy on The Tube cutest cub all day seen

And when he gets off leaves behind his magazine

It’s an NME mag from 2003

Reminds me of  gay night at  Benjys and who I used to be

Flip through the pages

Remember people and things

And when the train get to Mile End, my story begins

Get ready for action get out of the Tube

With m...

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https://youtu.be/BFdb1jbgZAE

Do you remember when were both young boys, James

us running through apple tree orchards where we both lived in Kent?

Tasting the apples made cider in the town pub?

Do you remember that hot summer night

when your friend  fell over us as we sat on that sofa?

His body spread over our laps

My hands threw themselves up in the air

that momentary jolt

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https://youtu.be/WX9tlTGPeDg

I walked in the kitchen and there was my Mum


Sat at the table with a truck load of plum


Whilst de-stoning the fruit to make into a pud


She wrote a short verse which I thought was quite good

See, Mum likes to write like she’s somebody else


Seems the voice of her poem was that of myself

And so, she wrote:

‘My mum’s been busy cutting ...

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https://youtu.be/WX9tlTGPeDg

I walked in the kitchen and there was my Mum


Sat at the table with a truck load of plum


Whilst de-stoning the fruit to make into a pud


She wrote a short verse which I thought was quite good

See, Mum likes to write like she’s somebody else


Seems the voice of her poem was that of myself

And so, she wrote:

‘My mum’s been busy cutting ...

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https://youtu.be/vjZmX-JL1sY?si=aveVcdWGx17KzcwQ

Beware, beware, there's a killer out there

Beware, beware, there's a killer dog out there

And his name is Rufus 

The public are advised to stay well clear

of a dog wanted in connection with a murder last year

His name is Rufus and has gone on the run

He’s aged seven in dog years and height 2 ft.1

He wears a brown c...

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https://youtu.be/oBg6-VBE_Zs

A day out with Rufus last year mid-September

What events of the day will me and Alex remember?

(Dog whistle)

Ah that command Alex you make to get Rufus attention

which you use on me too like I’m in detention

It’s sweet in a way, this agreed upon sound

that I use on you too when you’re messing around

Remember last Autumn, our day ...

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https://youtu.be/FQBPjsIk_Hc

Queering the landscape

Its points and angles creating a scene all of its own

Seemed so out of place in the shadow of mock Tudor terraces

But then strangely unapologetically making itself very at home

Awkward and not fitting in

Like me at that time in the 90s, in my chalet, queering and peering

Me fancying my best mate’s brother

At th...

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https://youtu.be/WX9tlTGPeDg

I walked in the kitchen and there was my Mum


Sat at the table with a truck load of plum


Whilst de-stoning the fruit to make into a pud


She wrote a short verse which I thought was quite good

See, Mum likes to write like she’s somebody else


Seems the voice of her poem was that of myself

And so, she wrote:

‘My mum’s been busy cutting ...

Read and leave comments (1)

https://youtu.be/JAupgZ2uKGc

Hair by Margaret.

Climb the staircase of the outside fire escape

The only way to reach Margaret’s salon she ran out of her top floor flat kitchen

Widows entertained with tea and gossip as cats clambered over their chairs

taking residence on their laps

Enjoying the company whilst having their fortnightly blue rinse

Mum went to Ma...

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https://youtu.be/3KTVkKjpPig

Rolling down school playing field, Summer 89

Me and boy mate land at the bottom, our bodies upside down

Our hair in each other’s mouths

Feeling giddy but upside down felt correct way up

‘I am Lee-Man, I have the power!’

In my bedroom playing with my He-Man

Dad playing Diana Ross downstairs

Boy with sword but also with wand

How many ...

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https://youtu.be/JRzUNUvONw4

Rolling down school playing field, Summer 89

Me and boy mate land at the bottom, our bodies upside down

Our hair in each other’s mouths

Feeling giddy but upside down felt correct way up

‘I am Lee-Man, I have the power!’

In my bedroom playing with my He-Man

Dad playing Diana Ross downstairs

Boy with sword but also with wand

How m...

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https://youtu.be/S7p8S0RsJKU?si=VPnTuCWx6OajMUdn

Climb aboard the 704 to Windsor

Great Grandad Ronald James is at the wheel

He drove the same Green Line bus every day in the Forties and Forties

Smog and chimneys gradually replacing the Kent and Sussex countryside

Walked home alone at 1am from where he left his bus at Woodbury Park Road in Tunbridge Wells

only to return a few...

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Sunday nights in the early Noughties,  London’s White Swan on my own

Then back to the place of the guy I’d pulled but most times leave alone

Famous for its amateur strip, lads getting out their bum

But most gay guys wanted meat in their eyes, the only reason why they’d come

This one night after last orders and needed bad to feel 

Something more than drunk and heartbroke cos it h...

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https://youtu.be/WP6kxwQqDjI

A source of frustration, my school sex education

My elderly teacher although terribly kind

was not well prepared for a teenagers’ mind

‘After several dates, buy a packet of Mates

Machines in most gents. Three for 99 pence

Andrew, this condom, roll it down this banana

I can hear giggles from someone. Is that you Pollyanna?’

Andrew struggled at...

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https://youtu.be/bbD8yIUnYIA

Aged 15. 1993

Ground-floor changing room of C&A

Cubicle 5

My cubicle

Scent lingering of previous occupant

Blue curtain

Neoprene drape

A makeshift door

Not fully covering

I could be fully exposed

with just the slightest breeze lifting the curtain

Upright mirror

Uptight attendant, downright shifty look

Did they suspect?

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f7vmsHMR4wY

Me growing up in Tunbridge Wells, what caught my fascination

was this rather impressive painted mural on the walls of the town train station

But in 1980s Tunbridge Wells, middle class and Tory

Mine was very, very different, a rather different story

My Dad belonged to the town Con Club and what  I remember most

is the person look...

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https://youtu.be/S05aRGucuak

I wait, dear friend, in line to collect you

you my rejected painting in this year’s competition

Unselected entry, now out of the race,

But when it’s my turn in the queue to be reacquainted with you,

I am caught between a rock and a very hard place

At the front of the queue is you waiting there

Wrapped up in paper and protective layer

I see ...

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https://youtu.be/yF3yepYfxgI
 

Hair by Margaret.

Climb the staircase of the outside fire escape

The only way to reach Margaret’s salon she ran out of her top floor flat kitchen

Widows entertained with tea and gossip as cats clambered over their chairs

taking residence on their laps

Enjoying the company whilst having their fortnightly blue rinse

Mum went to Margaret

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https://youtu.be/eYTLkku_rrw

Late Saturday night

Been around the Dilly to one to many cod racks

for a beverada or two 

Feeling rather tipsy as I like a diddle or three

That’s why they call me Vera Lee

On the Tube

I couldn’t believe my bins

This  fabulosa bene aris

My yews on his big round trummus through his tight trollies

He gets off the train and so do ...

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Climb aboard this Green Line bus to Windsor

Great Grandad is at the wheel

He drove the same bus every day in the 1940s and 50s

Smog and cityscape gradually replacing the Kent and Sussex countryside

Walked home alone at 1am from where he left his bus at Woodbury Park Road in Tunbridge Wells

only to return a few hours later to begin the day’s service

There and back, there and ...

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‘Your usual?, asks Giorgio

as he sprays water over my hair

and adjusts the chair so my head is in correct relation to the mirror

whilst he attaches a black drape over my front to catch the residue

My usual? I’ve had it all and never usually the same style in a row

Straight back and sides

Crew cut

Curtains

Number one all over

Never coloured or dyed

Except when I tried ...

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Nineties football. Chelsea game

Me and Dad. Loved it same

Both loved tackle. Different name

David Beckham, about to score

Saw his tackle, dropped my jaw

Dad shout, ‘GOAL!’, I shout ‘PHWOAR!’

'Dad, I’m gay'. Out it came

All Dad say was ‘Cut it out’

Chelsea lost, got his cane

Beat me until blood came out

Years later, though not forgot

Bully ...

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https://youtu.be/X_zbH_BK7y4

It’s been two years since I wrote a poem about Rufus my springer spaniel

Sharing I’m frightened of dogs and in need of a manual

That I often draw Rufus to understand better

Because I don’t share the bond he and my partner Alex have together

Be jealousy free, come out of the fog

Don’t play second fiddle when it comes to a dog

You can joke with y...

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https://youtu.be/TG9Ggc0xyBg

MICHAEL IN THE MOUNTAINS

Often the journey is more than the destination

The liminal journey

The space between

What is felt and what is seen

Through that window you peer out of

Is the window into yourself

This window

between me and the Sussex rural wilderness

This stretch of track

Reminds me

Summer ‘96

Buffalo towa...

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Nineties football. Chelsea game

Me and Dad. Loved it same

Both loved tackle. Different name

Beckham’s tackle. Felt no shame

'Dad I’m gay'. Out it came

Tried to hide. Tried to tame

Downplay gay. Felt to blame

All Dad say was 'Cut it out'

People pleaser. My mate Dan

Diamond geezer with a tan

Hid his thoughts about what I am

Hid he’s bi from his old man

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https://youtu.be/H12R3o6tCmw

I could not care less, at first
who was sitting beside me in 14A and B 
Having spent the week in Helsinki in search of 
He who drew men in bulging black and white, leather 
Through forests, through trees, in amongst the heather
I could not find Tom of Finland 
Now gazing out of my window at those same forests now miles above me 
With feelings akin to those of...

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