I merged your heart with mine

Speared all through to the core

Bleeding straight into my veins  

Hurting so sweet, I want it so

Our pulse and beats are in sync

Chest wall echoes for us to hear 

Warm familiar feel our skin know

The sensitive parts only I can find 

Flowers die, chocolates dissolve

Money transient, gifts age by day

Stare into my soulful eyes ins...

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We’ve been tiptoeing through walks of life

Dragging lessons of past years to the next

Hoping they serve in the arena of wisdom

Like a wild rose wishing it blossom one day

Young still although not wild. Preference.

On chase of goods overlooking greatness

Seed sawing luck in all fields of sourcing

Leave nothing to chance, but gracefulness

We forged masks shielding f...

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Looked forward to their presence

A sec in, a light smile, then it dimmed

Hearts turn cold protecting feelings

Hurt by acts of our inconsiderate conduct

Now blaming it on words of our expression

Silence saves from quarrels, not villainism

Stuck on doings that no more serve purpose

Contemplating the pain of letting go or regret

Fear prompt caution, not mastery to li...

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Still chasing nickels I appear to be well off

Deceived by appearance, fellows beg for shares

I am only learning to live, while surviving

Leads in my lane still hop from coin source to another

If it ain’t for money than what? I wondered

Turns out there’s mental health and mutual respect

The capitalism path I solidly believed is fading in trail

Counting down to letting...

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Poem my creation

Haven’t you pondered on wonders

Do you not question genes of your origin

Well, DNAs of your composition do vary

Process and placement do call for art though stylish

Conception of your form is meaningful though arbitrary

Conceived to whispers of stimulative thoughts

Born to scribes of ink onto faces of paper sheets

Revealed to sight in trace marks ...

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It has only been few decades living

I’ve closed my heart to keep out cold

Watch mentoring reels to fuel desires

Lock the doors to let thoughts wonder

I guess, this is what’s like chasing dreams

Guardians caution to look after others

Experience teaches guarding your own

I chose distance. Serving love on phones

Share walls with strangers of same goals

Justifiable prin...

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Loosing creativity for common ways

Saving time & effort with proven ways

Enthusiasm dimming, I’ll keep the desire

I guess, real manhood surpasses pleasure

There aren’t right choices, it’s the reasons

I try right actions, correcting last wrongs

Is it really living if memories easily blown

I guess, there’s longevity in slowing down

Times never really change, it’s pe...

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We were sitting by the fire.

Healing our wounded memories

By sharing what we all remembered.

Laughing at what was serious, now funny.

We were whole and home. Home sweet home.

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Too grown for home I know,

Too small for dreams I envision

Jammed between 8 to 5 daily

Carving rocks and paving paths

No step is little to take, I move

I became a man before the age

Witness pretty things peers eye

Some I could have, yet I do not

I weigh choices against values

It is nice, I take what suits me

I have set goals for growth sake

I disciplined...

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I set my phone on silence to think aloud

I got ringed for help, I am helping me too

I thought aging was growth, redefining it

It is losing the hard to replace characters

Taking time to break & rebuild flaw traits

I paid for knowledge with beans I picked

Schools I went to were built for capitalism

I got here just to learn, it’s all about money

I see, there’s more to buc...

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I would have been a Lion

Preys would have perished

Shaping me into the King.

I would have been a snake

Hunted for mystical beliefs

Hissed to life by holly man.

Now that I am a living man

Ambulating land for survival

What should my sins be?

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I am deepened into thoughts often

I hear a lot that way, I process like that

This is me reaching out with emotions

Easily misinterpreted message perhaps

Still, I am communicating with myself

You cut off needs conveying feelings

Gave me rejective silence as retribution

Persistently asked for emotional spills

You don’t need words to read the feels

A touch of comfort ...

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I have hoped from identity to identity.

Searching for the one fit for my skin.

Beat myself up on body features I got.

Wishful thinking of beauty, ooh my God.

I didn’t know, self-esteem is what I needed.

I listened to any adult, in search of wisdom.

Doubtful of my thinking against conformity.

I learned that ignorant adults do teach too.

Inducing their views on keenly en...

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I left the spotlights to build the King in me.

Dancing to the blues alone with a busy mind.

Looking back at faces I tried to buy, silly me.

Even those who mock us aid to our maturity.

I find roles to play, no more throwing blames.

Wishing good fortunes to brothers on grind.

Saying farewells to fellows we parted ways.

Seeking growth in other dimensions, age is free.

So,...

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Mind laying roadmaps to uncertain future

Leaving the past, there's nothing new here

Moving to contusive places strategically

Taking chances with faith to score wins

Still, I do 'sin when seen' here and there

The power that blesses us is not selective

We just take turns, I ready my cups daily

I won’t pray for better handouts anymore

Neither will I beg for what I can ear...

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Live it how you live it

I have sandboxed mine

I put thoughts to deeds

Bound to natural mistakes

But I choose the lessons

Free advice cost pain too

I too fuck up trying to love

Boys I keep think like I do

We share paths and words

Different work, same goals

Putting coins to good use

Sawing seeds to feed us later

Pimping shelters to houses

Time alone is for...

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Like a rose in Winter, I pray for rain

I yearn for heat that fight the freezes

Hard frost gets me dormant, I plead

Whipping winds strips off old blooms

Like any other adversary, cold passes

I count on roots & soil it’s anchored

Harvested for amused lovers, joyful

Winter hurts, Autumn always comes

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362 KM away, the only connection is through air

A ‘see you soon’ turned into towns apart, it’s far

I get it, fighting things you never cared about me

What is the trigger, whispers or family standards?

Do you remember the last time, a room in Vineta

Clean white sheets, food from service station, us

Half buried in blankets, eyes being fooled by Netflix

We both seemed happil...

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We're from the same street

We just took different turns

Some turns were dead-ends

Long roads for many mates

Few knew the short cuts

All headed for happy ending

We're racing at different speed

Same roads, different motors

Same culture, different rules

Love & respect is common here

The police is a common threat

We're thrilled by breaking norms

Street rai...

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Stories you told may caused a twitch of discomfort,

but i like it. Tell me more.

SMSes in your DM may invoke my jealousy,

but i love it. Read me all.

The activities of your day may not interest you,

but I wanna hear about it. Give me details.

Friends you make do not have my trust ,

but you have enough for all. Introduce me.

There are secrets you have swo...

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I'm puffed-up with consequential choices

There is a ringing thought sounding familiar

The rhythmical tune buzzing to be heared 

A tune powerful that it shifts my posture

The way I move, how I talk, how i look...

The melodic hum is not new nor foreign

Just that now it carries more weight

Enough weight to inluence my attitude

I could take sedative to silence the voices

But...

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You fly and land then fly away

I've marked your favourite spots

Without you they are so empty

I fill them with your photos

I tried to paint your heart in red

I do really know you true color

My african pretty little bird

When are you landing again

I'm here ready, anxiously waiting

With a sketch board on my lap

Camera for capturing your poses

I've a feeling we'l...

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Good things take time

I starved myself of snacks,

In faith of good things awaits

Will voicing my cravings,

Doom me the luck of manna,

I faithfully wait, I wonder

I've entaertained few thoughts

Not that I question my motives,

But I keep clean of ignorance

My patience is being tested

Morals are being questioned

Good things please come

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The stage had been set before my time

I’ve been reading scripts learning to act

Theology, psychology etc, it’s hard to play

Never could I master, but learn the little

I caught losses trying to win, still trying

Shit switches plans to ‘could have done’

But I guess more losses more lessons

A value maturity has taught me to love

Being young was tough, now it’s harsh

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I've stumbled on ups and downs

But at 26 i'm now leaning on ...

I've had cold summers and hot winters

Shit you only learn from growth

Growing apart with old friends

As days pass without conversations

Surely this was not planned for

But growth gave it, let's take it

When i get a chance i'll pour one

Than raise a toss and yell 'cheers!'

Appreciating the little...

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Who want's love, coz i don't

Maybe i don't know what it is

I want a series of good moments

Not a good life, i can't afford that

I want to cleanse and tell stories

Rest in peace on your soft chest

I want to fart in blankets and laugh

Have butt-fights for that extra bed space

I want to replay memories when away

Fantasize and play when you're here

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Through it I saw the real me

Turns out, it’s the figure I wanted

It reflected the brave me

Well, it’s the character I lacked

I got satisfaction in my reflection

The world saw a different image

I fine-tunned looks to my perfection

To my people it’s an ordinary picture

Foolishly I’ve lived, now I’ve learned

To carry load on my shoulder

My chest is not nearly s...

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Cluelessly age we chase,

Into youth we stumbled.

Have we had life compass,

We would figure it out.

Had it been simple,

We’d have done it.

Have it been short,

We’d reached there.

Had we known where,

We would head there.

Now that we do not,

Where do we go?

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The Hearts I Won Are Fragile To Carry

Don’t fall for my best

Find amusement in my worst

Then my blessings you’ll get                                  

Don’t be attracted to my habits

Find comfort in my habitats

Then you’ll stay till forever comes

Don’t be impressed by my doings

Find interest in my traits

Then your time with me will be joyous

Don’t ...

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I am taking a detour

Down the memory lane

Revisiting places we’ve been

People I danced with

Meals we shared

Roofs we laid under

Paths we took to get here

They’re rough rocky paved routes

With well filled stinky portholes in summer

Omni directional windy-dusty air in spring

We kept clean and healthy, or tried

Icy cold stony ground in winder

We watched out fo...

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When you are young

They assume you don’t know

But I know you’re powerful now 

Now that you are young

They’ll say they’ve seen it all

But I know you are special

When you are young

They only see your troubles

But I know your battles

Now that you are young

They think you are irrational

But I know you are logical

When you are young

They’l...

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The love I hold on to is imaginary

A mere illusion that subside fear of being lonely

Vows and promises as pillars keeping it sticky

Still I cling with hope of it lasting forever

The beings I call friends are scarce

Scattered in different cities, all away

Time and distance can't shake the bond

I will hold on to you, family of choice

The home I once loved is broken

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Scars of a mother don't heal of pain

Believe me, I tell what I have seen

Worries, care and love in her single emotion

She faced trouble that run with children

More wounds in her heart than on her body

Each cut tells its own story

I may have caused her few, I'm so guilty

Despite the pain she smiles at her baby

I couldn't imagine the feel inside

I've seen her cry...

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I pretend I don't feel a thing

Just to hide the true character

I pretend not to call or text

Just to get you miss me a little

Can we pretend to be more than friends

To have a pillow talk at 00:00

Can we pretend to be in a distance relationship

So we both have someone to call at 3 am

I pretend not to be into you

Just so you see me as different

I pretend to en...

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A lady is polite, she is courteous

Girls have emotions, she has empathy

Short, slim, sexy, call it beauty

But it's an extremely pretty figure

Loving, respective, call it brains

But it's the most humble character

Seductive smile, soothing voice

Salamander kind of eyes, pleasing

I've seen beauty, this is a gorgeous creature

I've met her Majesty, this is...

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Clearly, I'm a fool

You made me

Cluelessly, I've been blushing

You flatter me

Intriguingly, I react strangely

Your touch seduces

Confusingly, I am thoughtless

You give sensations

Basically, I am  new

New to this feeling

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What I want may make me happy

For how long, I don’t know

What I need could keep me stable

How strong, I don’t know

I just know there are things I want

and things I need

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I took a dose, it raised the stimuli

strange feelings, but still sensations

sure I thrived, but it’s the same game

shy? No! that's for yester-hours

I hit the thicker, thinner, the sexier

no type could be in my fear, beasting

ones, twice, ain't enough with that

not forever though, the fix is pro tem

sooner or later it leaves you with you

I’ve learned to stick to me, not a...

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You’ve built walls against suiters

To hide your persona

You’ve locked yourself inside

To protect your heart

I’ve made it pass the gate

I haven’t gotten through to you still

On your door I’ve knocked every evening

You pretended you ain’t heard

I guess you are still at war

With your heart and mind

Let your mind do decide

Because your heart is mine

We’ve been on di...

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I thought I knew me

Until I was home alone

The secrecy in my doing

Dirtiness in my thinking

There is darkness in me

That I can only reach alone

Walking around in clothe-less sleeve

Only my birth day suit on

Hairy reflections in the mirrors, staring

Sound of soothing jams through speakers

Shaking in a way only me would know

To the tune of my favorite rhythm

...

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It has been a long wait

With the past shaped in ups and downs

On a quest to find success and love

Pursuing endeavors leading to upper class

I grew up feeling disadvantaged

Now busy counting blessings of all sort

Family, friends, mentors, potential mistresses

Damn! So much to be grateful for

There’s no pleasure in hardship I earn bravery

Still it yields whom I’v...

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I pity the painters. Shuffling side to side at various positions not knowing how much pressure can a canvas take, force a brush stick needs, proper density of color gradient that reveal a true work of art and he is still trying to perfect beauty of an imperfect piece.

I see lovers contemplating on how deep to fall when depth shields off ultra-violets of loneliness, but sudden return from the co...

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Look!, there’s light out there

It should be morning

I’ve heard stories of the outland

There are wonders of all sort

Beings, beauty of all nature

You’ll see, learn and do if you go.

You should go, go out there

Just watch out for the rocks

You might trip and fall

This season rain may fall

Sun may burn as it grows

Take the umbrella. Now, go!

Don’t fear, g...

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I know her, at least I think

I mean, her color is navy-blue

She would paint light-grey

 I know her moods

She hides when she cries

If you know, where would she go?

I know enough to hold her

 Enough from her past of course

Her paining dislocated ankles

After every game she plays

Scars that marks her body

To her they’re reminders

Reminders of her old self

 I see...

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I hardly believed rainbow is a living,

That stars can fall

And the sun is never moving

“*”

I was never sure if feelings could own me,

That my heart could too decide

And loving is living

“*”

I couldn’t picture me as worth loving,

That my secrets can be told

And someone can still accept me

“Until you came around”

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As long as it took, I got here still

All the times, efforts, support and resources

Every restless night, cold-busy-morning, sleepy day I spent.

Gave me motivations that led me here

Every struggle, cut, blister, sweat, tear, bleed, pressure I endured

Gave me strength I needed to be here

Every advice, wisdom, lesson, experience, memory, love, prayer offered

Summoned the courage ...

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I had a wall made of gold

And she melted it all

My heart is as hard as a rock

But I bet she can break it

I’ve a muscular face with dry lips

She makes me stretch them

I used to think and wish

Now I sit around and phantasize

I’m acting smart & tough here

She got the stupid of me

She’s all over my head

To you, she stays a mystery

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We met as caterpillars

The ground will separate us as chrysalis

Beautiful creatures we will then emerge

You’ll be a butterfly, astonishing beauty

You’ll fly to wonder nature

When will you land?

I’ve shown you views, top and bottom

Being a living, you’re fated to be a prey

Lizards and dragonflies trying to snatch you

Far distance and away places you’ll be

Over water, l...

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We’ve been here before;

suck it up,

be the man.

You’ll get more

as you grow.

Revisiting moments

with frames of pain

loaded in hard times.

You ain’t the only

nor it is the last,

you’ll survive,

but do you learn?

Yell, scream, cry…

whatever the fuck you do

don’t lose focus.

You aren’t ignored young blood

they’ve gat pressing shit to handle,

make you...

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Don't go for beuty, get a keeper

Don't put it first, put it in the first

Don't follow your heart, follow your instinct

Those shoud've been the advice

The good ones don't criticize

The right time don't last long

The tough guys don't give up

Those should've been the signs

Don't dare lie, tell the truth

Don't get attached, you get hurt

Don't fall in love, you w...

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