I've always been a bit of a dandy
A popinjay...... A fop
A fashionista in my own mind
A coxcomb from bottom to top

And I've always been a bit of a poseur
But now that I'm close to drawing my pension
I had to up the ante a bit
In order to get the attention

I had diamontes on mi shoes
And a bright pink Panama hat on
Paired with the shortest of shorty short shorts
And a shirt with a ...

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The Rocky Horror Picture Show

The Rocky Horror Picture show

Where blokes dress up in drag

Audience participation

Not really my bag

But I liked the thought of dressing up

So thought I’d give it a go

And no excuses needed, at

The Rocky Horror Picture Show

I searched the house…for feminine garb

Like basques, fishnets, suspenders

Or anything to...

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Armadillo…… Draught British Sherry

It pissed it down that bitter cold night

Rain bounced off the roofs with a din

Dad looked out the window forlornly….. and said

I think I’d best have a night in

It was rare for mi dad… not to go out

And he made our lives hell.. when he din’t

But it wasn’t the weather…. that made him stop in

It was more to the fact…… he was skint...

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A Hard Frost

I thought that winter was over

What with bulbs pushing through in the garden

And I thought that we’d seen the last of the frost

But I woke up today to a hard ‘un

Just when I thought that spring had sprung

Winter comes back without warning

Just when I thought that the frost was all done

I woke to a hard ‘un this morning

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Don’t gi’ mi Dad a mid-week sub

He’ll piss it against a wall

Hang on… t’ya dosh till the job is done

Then you can gi’ ‘im it all

Don’t gi’ mi Dad a mid-week sub

NO…. wait till the job is over

If he’s brass in ‘is pocket…. ‘e wain’t come back

Leastways…. He wain’t come back sober

He’s fast-and-rough..... wi’out a drink

But He loses his speed…. after beers

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