You're a big girl 

With every decision you make

You don't waver in front of people 

With the choices you've made 

You stand your ground 

With a smile or one turned upside down 

And you're outspoken when bystanders look away

Sugar, spice and everything nice 

Is not all what you're made of 

Your sweet and sourness gives you power 

That keeps you from going the wrong way

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When she folded into herself

You all looked away

When she unraveled

You all watched

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I've sat up a tree for days and no-one noticed.
Neither the few who wandered underneath,
Nor the even fewer who should have cared.
Enough to realise I was missing!
And no-one came searching.
Time has no meaning, when the bark is pressing
Into the base of your spine.
And trees don't have cushions!
After the first hours, you only know you are there
Because you can't feel your feet.
Only fo...

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I miss the way you make brews too weak,
Served up with endless biscuits,
I miss the way the room goes quiet,
When we howl with childish laughter,

I miss stealing words,
Between cries of our children,
Time standing still,
As we ramble through weeks again,
I miss lifting each other up,
Plotting schemes for the future,

'Thank goodness for videocalling'
I say it, it's true,
But oh, how...

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You’ll always Be My Friend (You Know Too Much!)

We are Alcoholics Anonymous without substance abuse.

A support group where no topic is taboo.

What goes on tour, stays on tour.

We step through a kaleidoscope of pain

from tender wounds of unrequited love

to brutal annihilation of innocence.

No stone is left unturned.

Emotions and insecurities are scrutinis...

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Once there was a boy
Full of misery and no joy
Given up hopes a long by
Just in a stand still when she crossed by.

'You can do it. You were great'
This was the first time when someone said..
This feeling of accomplishment he never felt,
This feeling of achievement he never had.

Never had someone who believed in him.
Waiting for a long time, gathering enough guts,
Wanted to say 'thank...

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They all turn into madness.

Fear, the poison, injected too often.

A vaccination to prevent you from optimism,

from being an individual,

from the hope you kept deep inside.

You are infected with gloomy thoughts and panic feelings,

a fever of silence.

Only your own mind can set you free,

let you heal and open your eyes for beauty, kindness

and the hidden truth.

cop...

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Today is not over yet,

Which means yesterday may have been the hardest day of your life,

As if you were driving down a never-ending dead end, stuck in reverse;

But you are still here.

You can’t recall the time your mother held you out of the bedroom window,

The blaze within threatening to scorch you, your cradle and home,

The scent of smoke on your baby clothes has long sinc...

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Her skin can open up like a mouth

It can speak

When it parts

It can extend like a tongue

It can taste

Your arteries are seams

Try to unpeel them

Slip off your flesh

Undress

Search your pores

For secret trap doors

Let the inside out

Part it like a mouth

Like hers

It can speak

Unfold the red carpets

Of rolled and folded tongue

Let it searc...

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I will gladly be your beacon,
or equally the hand you hold 
in the moments just before the dawn 
you fear will never come.

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There were tears

Rolling down my face.

I never was a pretty crier,

So I looked away.

Heard your voice

Over my heavy breathing,

Crying harder when you said

You weren't leaving.

I hold tight to everything;

Knuckles white from my grip.

If I let go, even a little,

My whole world could slip.

I've been afraid, though,

To hold onto you.

My heart ga...

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{What I Need} 

What I need is to be 

the same person I was 

before chiari 

And what I need is

to be that person who

can be able to cope 

with life again

And I need to feel 

calm and not so 

panicky 

And I need to feel

good about myself

And not so bad 

about myself

And for the thing's in

my life that I am u...

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The Clearing Inspired by a dream I had as confirmation of My commitment to remain in the darkness with my friend as long as need be. I hear the screams of centuries falling Compassion, tumbling…down Values, landing…loudly Chainsaws…cutting… Right through our very hearts, Trucks dragging… Lifeless… Humanity… I tear through the thick of it Struggling to stay on my feet Terrified I run…I run, B...

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Six months, ten days have passed Yet nothing has changed

Time has not started since that April day…

Sadness remains Tears constant

Helpless still…

Days remind me of a rollercoaster ride Not one you enjoy…

But the dreaded kind… Where every uncertain second So unkind

One day bearable… The next, a bottomless pit…

Falling, Anger overwhelming Emptiness always …

Helpless still

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Step Into the recesses of my heart, mind and soul. participate in stimulating ,thought provoking but brutally honest chats. Whether its company ,advice or a need to vent or simply laugh, no topic is off the table. Un-accepting sanctimonious non-humans, so blinded by their ignorance and fear they can't see the beauty in the unique-ness of each of us are Not welcomed. With the magic within words I...

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How is it

that even someone
that clings to broken toys
with a mix of
nostalgia and remorse
that cradles a chinadoll
whose chipped fingers slip through flesh
to the infantile heart at the center of
neurons
Could still
be held in the cradle of arms
owned by someone whose own skin
wields their own patterns of 'horse play'
And brazenly still
Refuses to let go
Of such an uncoordinated ...

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Note: there is some strong language in this. it's not too bad. it's not too excessive, either. one word in here twice, i think. and if you're wondering, yes, the colors mean something. and yes, im genuinely asking a question to you, the reader. and to the person this is about. but i pray he never reads or finds this. anyway, enjoy.

Am I selfish for wanting another hug? 

I handed you the...

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I needed a pillow under my head

to support me

Not to cover my face

smothering me

Can't you see 

that's what you did to me?

---

I did not run to be mean

or control you

I ran because I could not breath...

---

But I needed a pillow

so I kept coming back

Hoping you would learn

to be by my side

Equal beings

neither better or worse

Existing to support e...

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A single word;

a phrase or gesture

can trigger a feeling

of wondrous rapture.

To be told that you're worth

more than the drifting sands

that daily slip through

your trembling hands.

To be surrounded

by such appreciative people

makes me want to shout

from the highest steeple.

Words of thanks,

so loud that you all know,

that for you, the ink

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To end life support

A difficult decision

Rest in peace Daddy

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A winter bite that

mocks the spring, pincers its cocoon.

A life supported?

Cease one's internal decay,

Even ice melts. Love's fluidity.

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They say home is where the heart is

and my heart is where the art lives.

So where is my home?

Art lives within us all

and begins an internal/external exchange...

a process

like humanity to trees.

We stop, relax, breathe

as one.

So where is my home?

First Contact was my spiritual home

gave meat and marrow to

broken sp...

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`



Sing, through the flowing tears,
And laugh though it aches,
ask again for love in rejection's face
into the sun's first brilliant rays

Peer into that song and hear its heart
take along these raindrops' prisms
let them glow in the dark of night
its tune your comfort and companion

Hold your friend deep within your soul,
journey into th...

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