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The Antipoet

Thu 1st Jul 2010 22:53

Thank you all for your wonderful comments.

"Ian Dury meets Elvis"! Wow complements indeed...Do you mind if we quote that? ;-)

The music has been carefully constructed to complement the words so that, hopefully, the whole package is more than the sum of the parts. Glad you liked it and thanks for the welcome.

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Lynn Dye

Thu 1st Jul 2010 22:26

I enjoyed this,Jack. I think it works well just as it is.

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Val Cook

Thu 1st Jul 2010 22:23

Welcome Jack. Interesting poems especially enjoyed
"Where have all the rock stars gone?"
.

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Val Cook

Thu 1st Jul 2010 22:15

Overall quite good,but like you say it is long, could do with tightening and trimming.
ie: Shaven headed Geezers
"I ought to get dry with a pint" ??
and some punctuation Jack. It should perform well. Good work.

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Lynn Dye

Thu 1st Jul 2010 21:42

I find this really lovely, Ann.

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<Deleted User> (7212)

Thu 1st Jul 2010 20:42

Hi Ann - but you're barely out of your teens yet !
(crimplene & tweed)

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Ann Foxglove

Thu 1st Jul 2010 20:40

I really like this - I feel as if I can hear you reading it - very immediate, full of life and intriguing.

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Ray Miller

Thu 1st Jul 2010 20:28

Thanks very much to the Spider, the Dog, the Bee Gee and Bernie.

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<Deleted User> (7075)

Thu 1st Jul 2010 20:23

Welcome to WOl. great stuff! enjoy exploring the site. nice audio sample. winston

you can put more audio on blog entries of course. You don't necesarily have to put the words up.

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Ann Foxglove

Thu 1st Jul 2010 19:57

Shhoosh! I made a few changes.

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Ann Foxglove

Thu 1st Jul 2010 19:29

Hello, welcome to WOL. Liked your audio and the poem too. (Audio reminded me a bit of Edgar Broughtan - before your time I expect!)

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Ann Foxglove

Thu 1st Jul 2010 19:27

Hey! Liked the audio - Ian Dury meets Elvis on first hearing! Welcome to WOL. x

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<Deleted User> (7212)

Thu 1st Jul 2010 16:08

Hi Cyn - "crimplene & tweed" - you are so kind to me & my poems - I don't know what I've done to deserve it, since many of them are just daft throwaway ideas. I remember commenting on yours about "what women want" type of theme a while ago which was really good, but sometimes it doesn't seem fair that one or two poets just seem to "ring our bell" & yet others ignore them. Ah well different strokes & all that !
all the best. B

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<Deleted User> (8408)

Thu 1st Jul 2010 16:00

Hi John, thanks very much for your comment on my profile - I was chuffed! Will be blogging more soon. Love 'Our Gert' and look forward to reading more. Dianna.

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<Deleted User> (6484)

Thu 1st Jul 2010 15:44

enjoyed this Ray
Bernie

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<Deleted User> (6534)

Thu 1st Jul 2010 11:44

very enjoyable, repays repeated readings, love the jokes and rhymes

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<Deleted User> (7164)

Thu 1st Jul 2010 10:22

Yeah i really enjoyed this too. Some great imagery and the rhythm bounces along quite merrily. Love it!
Nice one! ;-)

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Horace Thespider

Thu 1st Jul 2010 09:32

superb. This shows real craftsmanship and discipline as well as having moments of sublime madness. Worthy of being megaphoned from the top deck of Preston Bus Station. On a Saturday.

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<Deleted User> (7164)

Thu 1st Jul 2010 08:47

Hi there, just listened to your audio. I like the fact that the acoustics don't override the words which does seem to occur with a lot of this particular style of performance poetry.

I love your take on Moses. Very funny. Great stuff :-)

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<Deleted User> (7164)

Thu 1st Jul 2010 08:34

Hi Mal, thank you very much for your comment on 'Tiptoe through the tulips.'
Very much appreciated,
Janet.x

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<Deleted User> (7164)

Thu 1st Jul 2010 08:32

Is this based on poetry critique Mal?
Seems like there's a fair battle going on. It reminds me of the phrase 'he/she gives as good as he/she gets.'

Nice to see you posting again (wish you would find a nicer photo though) :-)

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Isobel

Wed 30th Jun 2010 22:23

Yes - I would tend to agree with Ann's interpretation. This a poem about significant role change. A woman's need for a man who is distanced. The pressures that brings. Where he was once in control, the driving force of a knife in fact to her lamb, now he is domesticated, tamed, turned to stone by the weight of her expectations. I was a bit puzzled by the Frank reference but I've come to the conlusion you are referring to Frankincense which would tie in with the candles and prayers.

A sad poem but a good one cos it is so refreshingly different.

Comment is about How To Fix A Broken Man (blog)

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Francine

Wed 30th Jun 2010 22:06

I have read through this several times John, and I keep coming back to it!
I do have to agree that I love how it can be interpreted in so many ways...

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Francine

Wed 30th Jun 2010 21:38

I enjoyed reading this sad tale, even though I will never understand
how someone could never have the courage to let someone else know
how they truly feel...

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<Deleted User> (7075)

Wed 30th Jun 2010 17:08

Welcome to our not so little site Cathy, hope you enjoy reading and finding all the little gems on here. Winston

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<Deleted User> (7212)

Wed 30th Jun 2010 16:15

I love the twist at the end - comes as a complete surprise
(in spite of the title, I didn't see it coming)

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<Deleted User> (7212)

Wed 30th Jun 2010 16:01

"Real neat" Alison

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Rachel Bond

Wed 30th Jun 2010 15:51

ah no im sorry you felt like that. i love your enthusiasm and spirit, i once felt like that...my mind, jet streaming always but particularly that night. i had personal stuff going on, nothing to do with company.thanks for your concern x

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Rachel Bond

Wed 30th Jun 2010 15:47

wow its almost the valhalla sun in moonlight in its opposite.x

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Ann Foxglove

Wed 30th Jun 2010 15:21

Ta Stef - oooh! You are clever!

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Steven Kenny

Wed 30th Jun 2010 12:38

Not even with my manly new scar Rachel!? :-)

Thanks for the comment though! :-)

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Rachel Bond

Wed 30th Jun 2010 11:52

i live on chapman st which i thought similar to the names of murderer harold shipman and the the name of mark chapman the fool who shot john lennon(GRHS)...now the name of a mutilated victorian prostitute...its all so grim i love it. yet it is really a very nice little street. The neighbour informed me however that one of us residents was held up at gunpoint for their shopping and another tried to cut off his own head! :) i believe non of it but not a bad welcome eh?

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Rachel Bond

Wed 30th Jun 2010 11:40

in my eyes kenny youre lovely like a cherub...sorry if this is not 'you are rugged like a swarthy handsome film actor', but i think its better x

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Malpoet

Wed 30th Jun 2010 11:30

I like that one John.Intriguing.

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Ann Foxglove

Wed 30th Jun 2010 10:07

How the flip do you spell moustacheoed?? ;-)

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<Deleted User> (7164)

Wed 30th Jun 2010 09:13

Hi Gus, just doing a bit of reading and came across this. It reflects life and the human condition in all its complexity. The things we do eh?
It feels as though there's a little sadness in a moment of reflection. I like it :-)

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Ann Foxglove

Wed 30th Jun 2010 09:13

Thank you Larisa (Falling in Love by Surprise) for your kind comments! x

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Larisa Rzhepishevska

Wed 30th Jun 2010 09:12

Beautiful poem Ann. I love it. With warmest wishes, Larisa

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Ann Foxglove

Wed 30th Jun 2010 09:12

Ta John (Falling in Love by Surprise) for your kind comments! x

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<Deleted User> (7164)

Wed 30th Jun 2010 09:05

Hi John, yes this is an intriguing poem and i agree it can be interpreted in many ways. In my present mode, it reflects a love but the love can be associated with many things, this website just as an example :-)

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Andy N

Wed 30th Jun 2010 08:15

defo song like quality to this, Ann. The twist round at the end works pretty well too.. Nice one! x

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Larisa Rzhepishevska

Tue 29th Jun 2010 23:39

Thank you for your comment, my dear friend.

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Lynn Dye

Tue 29th Jun 2010 23:02

Beautiful, Larisa.

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<Deleted User> (8394)

Tue 29th Jun 2010 20:22

Your welcome, I love the first line, though not sure why you are in the wardrobe! Is that where men do these things?

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Ann Foxglove

Tue 29th Jun 2010 20:04

Hi again John - I've been reading through your poems and I like them a lot - esp this one. And you profile ones too, very much!

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John Coopey

Tue 29th Jun 2010 19:56

Lovely Ann. Nice turn at the end.

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Ann Foxglove

Tue 29th Jun 2010 19:42

ooops! Yes, read it quickly this morning and then went back. Hence my mistake! x

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John Togher

Tue 29th Jun 2010 19:28

Thank you for your comments, Val, on 'How To Fix A Broken Man'. Don't you listen too much to that Mr Thomas! (Although he can be very insightful...)

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John Togher

Tue 29th Jun 2010 19:22

Hello Ann,
Cheers for reading and commenting on 'How To Fix A Broken Man'. I've replied in the comments section of the poem, but I'll also tell you here - the 'marine on the beach' line was something Darren wrote himself in the comments under the poem, I haven't edited the poem since first putting it up and that line was never in the poem. He's a sneaky one that Mr Thomas.

Glad you enjoyed it! Even if you read lines that were never there! x

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John Togher

Tue 29th Jun 2010 19:18

Cheers for the comments, all.

Ann, I haven't changed it. The 'marine on the beach head' was something Darren wrote below!

But most are not too far away with interpretation, and as I've said before, there's no right or wrong way of interpretation and the writer's intent isn't that important as long as a reader enjoys a piece.

Glad you've enjoyed it.

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