They say the camera never lies but I believe the mirror never lies and I am not always comfortable with what I see staring back at me.
Nice one
Comment is about SORRY, MY MISTAKE (blog)
Original item by trevor homer
There are some magnificent lines here Peter. too many to single out. This feels like a wonderfully described slice of church life. The description of the instruments and the parts they play within the poem and what's going on the church are fabulous
Nice one
Comment is about HANGING FROM THE RAFTERS (blog)
Original item by Peter Taylor
Keith you have left me wanting more. You have created a wonderful rhythm and pace with this piece of excellently crafted poetry. I just wanted more.
beautiful my friend
Comment is about Beneath the Surface (blog)
Original item by keith jeffries
I try to write down as much as I can about the past now. Although |I use a computer I still prefer everything being in hard copy if I can.
An excellent poem Laura
love it
congratulations on POTW
Martin
Comment is about 'Log In*' by Laura Taylor is Write Out Loud's Poem of the Week (article)
Original item by Stuart Buck
Thank you Don for stopping by, reading and liking my poetries. This makes me so happy.
Comment is about Don Matthews (poet profile)
Original item by Don Matthews
This looks quite like an excellent poetical reworking of the book of Genesis. Of course thats just my reading. But a nice poem anyway.
Comment is about And There Was (blog)
Original item by afishamongmany
Suor Angelica is much underrated
Comment is about Highbrow Nonsense (blog)
Original item by branwell kent
Hey Fish! Thank you very much. Now you are right about the "arc" thing, I meant a boat like Noah's ark. So I'm going to correct that! Thanks! As for the yo-hos they seem to be a misfit but I kinda like them!
Martin, thanks for stopping by! Perhaps I shouldn't have used such a famous painting after all! It's glorious and I'd love to see it up close. But maybe it's irrelevant to the spirit of the sea shanty/sestina!
And Tommy, now I get it! I think you're right.
Thank you all?
Mae
Comment is about Hades' Ferry- A Sea Shanty (blog)
Original item by Mae Foreman
Yea Lisa-- bacon ice cream-- that is a very hard sell.
A boiled egg, some toast and Marmite and a good cup of builders tea will do me fine any time.
Go well
><>
Comment is about What Flavor Are You (blog)
Original item by Lisa C Bassignani
I thought the painting was a Turner. There is quite a collection of them at the national gallery in London.
This definitely almost has the vibe of a sea shanty, but quite a perilous one when you talk about Hades and going across the river Styx.
Nice one Mae
Comment is about Hades' Ferry- A Sea Shanty (blog)
Original item by Mae Foreman
Yo-ho Mae - Impressive, as Devon says a Sestina is not for the faint hearted or those in a hurry. A worthy and worthwhile theme to invest oneself in. As I say impressive.
Now just two things ? - I'm thinking that maybe? you mean 'ark' (as in boat) and not 'arc' (as in rainbow)? 'Arc' could work (sort of) but ...?
Ok now this 'Yo-ho' thing. I sort of get why you've done it but imho you don't need it. The meat of the poem is strong enough and rhythmic enough without it. It is the repetitions at the end of the lines that is the strength of a Sestina. Yes if you scrapped the Yo-hos there would be quite a bit of reshaping up to do but...
Of course as always it's the poet's poem. ?
><>
Comment is about Hades' Ferry- A Sea Shanty (blog)
Original item by Mae Foreman
You had me with those opening lines . A real cracker this one. I love your use of traperzoid in this context.
Nice one Tommy
Comment is about Persephone's tangled legs (blog)
Original item by Tommy Carroll
I think I like this poem because I find it intriguing. Not completely certain what its all about but could mean so many different meanings on different levels.
Comment is about Shipwrecked (blog)
Original item by Kwan Srijomkwan
"He can get no sleep, he can get no rest, yo-ho, and he can get no peace..."
This is what I mean by assertion Mae ?
Comment is about Hades' Ferry- A Sea Shanty (blog)
Original item by Mae Foreman
Keith I think it could be because people in dinner jackets and evening gowns started going to concerts. Plus so much nonsense is talked about what is purported to be serious music. When much of this music was written it was for the masses.
Thought provoking poem on some marvellous music Branwell
Comment is about Highbrow Nonsense (blog)
Original item by branwell kent
Thank you Devon and Ray. Have slightly rejigged some line breaks.
A small jewel of thought then - let it be.
><>
Comment is about And There Was (blog)
Original item by afishamongmany
Yep I am with Keith on the bacon ice cream.But it is a poem that has got me salivating.
Nice one
Comment is about What Flavor Are You (blog)
Original item by Lisa C Bassignani
Lit a spark in her heart flowed in her heart.
What great line John
Love the poem
Comment is about CONSEQUENCES (blog)
Original item by John E Marks
The moon features large in life for many reasons - many captured
in song and verse. I've come to see it as a distant signpost intended
to lead us on past its own presence - a pointer to all that lies beyond.
Comment is about Leave Us The Moon (blog)
Original item by d.knape
Another bit of rhyming whimsy to relish.
I enjoy much of the music in opera but have always found it difficult
accepting a very large loud-voiced woman looming over a less
physically imposing man while singing of love - not unusual in this
particular musical genre.
Comment is about Highbrow Nonsense (blog)
Original item by branwell kent
Thank you, sincerely, Peter and Jon.
“I almost wish we were butterflies and liv'd but three summer days - three such days with you I could fill with more delight than fifty common years could ever contain.”
― John Keats, Bright Star: Love Letters and Poems of John Keats to Fanny Brawne.
Comment is about Wild Butterfly (blog)
Original item by John E Marks
The painting? Yes Turner! I found it on the internet and just loved it! But for the sake of avoiding misunderstandings I have to state here that I present no assertions. This is a story that I made up and dedicated to people who have both been victims of treachery as well as received help by people from both sides of the ocean. I don't mean to point fingers nor do I get into politics. Ever! It's the people that I care about, the people and their exploits that move me and the people's pain that makes me hurt. In this pieces and in most of my poems I focus on that.
Thank you for seeing more than I do into my piece ?
Mae
Comment is about Hades' Ferry- A Sea Shanty (blog)
Original item by Mae Foreman
I wonder why classical music is considered highbrow.
Keith
Comment is about Highbrow Nonsense (blog)
Original item by branwell kent
Lisa,
My flavour stands in awe at this poem as I am a vegetarian but am well able to recall those days when I thoroughly enjoyed a fillet steak with black pepper sauce. What you offer is tempting but I would have to say a decidedly NO to Bacon Ice Cream.
A good poem
Thank you for this
Keith
Comment is about What Flavor Are You (blog)
Original item by Lisa C Bassignani
There is much to be grasped in this work Mae.
I am making that effort.
Turner perhaps?
Tommy
Comment is about Hades' Ferry- A Sea Shanty (blog)
Original item by Mae Foreman
Hi Dev and Don
I do appreciate your posts.
I may have left the back-door open in this poem.
The shape of some light, on a surface through window glass, can be fancifully described as such.
And Dev pardon my use of "To clarify" that upon retrospect came across as a rebuff - far from it. It was a genuine request to enquire.
The legs and her legs.
Cheers lads.
Tommy
Comment is about Don Matthews (poet profile)
Original item by Don Matthews
Hi Dev and Don
I do appreciate your posts.
I may have left the back-door open in this poem.
The shape of some light, on a surface through window glass, can be fancifully described as such.
And Dev pardon my use of "To clarify" that upon retrospect came across as a rebuff - far from it. It was a genuine request to enquire.
The legs and her legs.
Cheers lads.
Tommy
Comment is about Persephone's tangled legs (blog)
Original item by Tommy Carroll
Here comes Don to taint our moon
You sure it's really there?
And not a useful metaphor
For poets to ensnare?......
Comment is about Leave Us The Moon (blog)
Original item by d.knape
Golly gosh! I can't keep up
The humour bug is catching
I just comment on one here and
The next's at my door scratching
Must move on.....?
Comment is about Highbrow Nonsense (blog)
Original item by branwell kent
Congratulations Laura
Comment is about 'Log In*' by Laura Taylor is Write Out Loud's Poem of the Week (article)
Original item by Stuart Buck
Clever response DoRoThY.....
Comment is about Terrible, I Like You (blog)
Original item by Don Matthews
Very nice and so sweet!
Thank you?
Mae
Comment is about Leave Us The Moon (blog)
Original item by d.knape
I know a little bit myself of the Eurasian paradigm. I will cautiously say that sometimes collective societies seem (seem) to be functionning more harmoniously than individualistic ones when dealing with certain things. But that's only partially right. I can't offer an educated analysis either. I think we can agree there's a controversy in this as there is in everything.
Thank you for taking the time Rachel!?
Mae
Comment is about The 21st Century Paradigm (blog)
Original item by Mae Foreman
John I can't believe
The record people haven't
Signed you with a contract
With such fantastic talent
Tra la la la la la la la la
(I would sound like a wounded dingo....? )
Comment is about John Coopey (poet profile)
Original item by John Coopey
John you must check comments
On your profile page
More than once in several months
Someone might want engage
How would you feel if someone
Gave you heaps of praise
And you ignored them several months
The giver would go crazed
On other hand they could John
Curse you on and on
You wouldn't know but others would
(You need to check more often.....) ?
Comment is about John Coopey (poet profile)
Original item by John Coopey
Thanks for reading and commenting Tommy! It does need several readings ,it was a first effort and it doesn't flow all that well, the rhythm changes a lot from verse to verse... I'd love to hear your thoughts after those several readings and investigations! Thank you Tommy! ?
Mae
P.S. Boy, you sure have a lot of double letters in your name, I just observed! Double "m" in your first name, double "r" and double "l" in your last name!
Comment is about Hades' Ferry- A Sea Shanty (blog)
Original item by Mae Foreman
Interesting article John, and some great poems. I especially like The way things are is the way things have to be. I saw David Constantine giving a reading at Ilkley a few years ago, reminds me I should read some more of his poetry.
Comment is about My kind of poetry: six new poems from David Constantine (article)
Original item by Greg Freeman
Beautiful, John. And the music, too
Comment is about Wild Butterfly (blog)
Original item by John E Marks
'Fraid dk your poems
Always make me sick
Sick with laughter (that is)
I then can take the mick
The serious ones however
I know they must come out
I cannot take the micky
On these which are about....
Things we need to ponder
(I need to garden shape)
Instead've of rhyming nonsense
To someone called d knape ?
Comment is about d.knape (poet profile)
Original item by d.knape
Good morning John.
I feel privileged to be the first reader to comment this morning. This is a beautiful poem which everybody really ought to read and then, as soon as possible, get out and find a butterfly from which to learn. It should be a momentous occasion!
Thank you for this.
Peter T
Comment is about Wild Butterfly (blog)
Original item by John E Marks
Sun 21st Jul 2019 02:47
My poetry is
the silent killer.
Comment is about Graham Sherwood (poet profile)
Original item by Graham Sherwood
...but much more hangs and waits explanation. As a reader I would say that your verse requires several readings and that some investigation as to the assertions claimed in the piece. But I will (will) need more of the sestina. Tommy
Comment is about Hades' Ferry- A Sea Shanty (blog)
Original item by Mae Foreman
Perverse?
Diverse?
I suspect
You're worse
Comment is about DIVERSE (blog)
Original item by M.C. Newberry
The words and suppressed anger to me is of loss and betrayal. There are accusations and knowlage of those responcible.
Ships and the drowned.
xx
Comment is about Hades' Ferry- A Sea Shanty (blog)
Original item by Mae Foreman
Devon Brock
Sat 20th Jul 2019 23:41
Sounds good, Mae. Since you pushed me toward a sonnet, and I pushed you toward a sestina. Perhaps you will present me form to undertake and we'll see what happens, because this is fun and challenging.
D
Comment is about Mae Foreman (poet profile)
Original item by Mae Foreman
Martin Elder
Sun 21st Jul 2019 18:56
I love the honesty with which have punctuated this poem. The last few lines are particularly telling in all that we are as people. I feel that we can spend too much time trying to reach perfection a state which none of us can do. something which you rightly question and address .I love the notion of
Happy is finding roots in a community
brimming with love
what a wonderful line
Nice one hk
Comment is about Friday, June 21, 2019 11:48 AM (blog)
Original item by hk