I love this too, Andy.
It reminds me of how you feel when visiting a place for the first time...
all the wonder.


I never got to visit Blackpool... on my to do list : )

Comment is about Ticket to Ride (Blackpool Mystery) (blog)

Original item by Andy N

I have to agree with the others... What an engaging, fun read, Ray!

Love these lines:

'I find them wrathful and jealous gods
whom I can't be bothered appeasing'

'I shall have to put you down
as impotent, I'm afraid.
I take it like a man.
And what do you do for exercise?
I smile at her and she smiles back.'

Comment is about The Medical Examination (blog)

Spooky - the feelings this evokes reminds me of both being caught in a blizzard, and an old graveyard!

'only the hardiest of dead souls walk these moors'


p.s. I love the word 'Atrocious' - I used to say it all the time : )

Comment is about Ghosts of Rivington Moor (blog)

Original item by Jeffarama!

Hi Alison, thanx for your comment, it can be a cruel place, glad you didn't get stuck! Glad you like it, by the way I had started to write it then your ghost theme came up so very well timed! Keep up your good work Jeff X

Comment is about Alison Smiles (poet profile)

Original item by Alison Smiles

Love this one Andy. Lovely little poem with a lovely lovely ending.

Comment is about Ticket to Ride (Blackpool Mystery) (blog)

Original item by Andy N

...and thus it goes.

LET ME EXPLAIN...

(and thus it goes. My brain interposing with drivel...)
and sometimes the words come out wardback and shus instead of 'thus' but should come out frontward...'Thus'
( I tire of this consious senility, this humour by disguise...)
...with lost inflection and missing adverbs splet not spelt...
( and so it goes...)

and...thus it goes.

Comment is about Cynthia Buell Thomas (poet profile)

Original item by Cynthia Buell Thomas

Hi Cynthia this is so evocative - water on skin makes the reader feel like a Peeping Tom. Guess many local lakes are legend rich - locally we have something called the Silent Pool complete of course with the legendary maiden myth.

'Folding her clothes over her mind' a metaphor perhaps for post hanky panky guilt! Yes, of course, re read, your added comments which do imply that.

Comment is about Girl in a Lake (blog)

Original item by Cynthia Buell Thomas

Wow. Very haunting and scary. Indeed it does make you shiver. Makes me glad to be indoors tonight! Great piece.

Comment is about Ghosts of Rivington Moor (blog)

Original item by Jeffarama!

Thanks again :) x

Comment is about Untitled1# (blog)

Just a note over the WOL Stockport Special called 'Read Out Loud' done at Stockport Art Gallery.

Apart from the laptop not liking my backing footage, the night was a nice success with a nice audience of around 30 odd people with the following people who read (Some more than once)

1) John
2) Andy N
3) Maggie
4) Dorinda
5) Mechsia
6) Dave
7) Nigel
8) Linda
9) Cassis
10) Neil
11) Sam
12) Sheridan
13) Karla

Special mention must go to Sam, who I think was Dorinda's grandson and for a tender age read out a brilliant poem, and as advised by Nigel had to write it from memory upon arrival.

Finally, while I throughly enjoyed last night, the best sort of praise that can be given came from my other half, Cathy who read there last month for the first time and while well enough to attend last night wasn't well enough to perform said 'it's so welcoming this group, i would recommend it to anybody'.

Review is about Write Out Loud Stockport on 11 Jul 2011 (event)

excellent stuff, kealan.. are you getting this stuff printed or published as your last few on here have been getting better and better.. A

Comment is about Nothing Is Ugly In The Dark (blog)

Original item by Kealan Coady

i think these kind of things are a bit hit and miss for me, Gem but I really like this.. I totally agree with Val - it certainly flows really, really well.... A

Comment is about "Love You Millions" A Cut-Up Type Poem (blog)

Original item by Gemma Lees

one of your best, Jeff I feel.. The ending works particularly well, m8.. top one - proud of you.. A

Comment is about Ghosts of Rivington Moor (blog)

Original item by Jeffarama!

If this poem was on before - apologies. Sorry about two poems one right after the other, but I didn't want to let the category just slip by, as I did with the voting last time.

I've always thought 'goblins and fairies' are euphemisms for 'libido'.

Comment is about Girl in a Lake (blog)

Original item by Cynthia Buell Thomas

I don't think that any bird worth its salt would care tuppence whether a paltry human being was listening! No flower would notice if you or I was smelling it's perfume. They are just here for themselves, as we are. Man/flower/bird - who is the most important? All equal in my eyes!

Comment is about Eye of the Beholder (blog)

Original item by John Embley

This is very interesting Kealen. I think that the dark is more worrying than the light. Maybe that's just me! Good poem anyway!

Comment is about Nothing Is Ugly In The Dark (blog)

Original item by Kealan Coady

Very funny Ray,I read it twice. Good work.

Comment is about The Medical Examination (blog)

Well done Gemma it certainly flows,I like this I may try it myself.

Comment is about "Love You Millions" A Cut-Up Type Poem (blog)

Original item by Gemma Lees

Aye no worries chuck - hope you enjoy :) DEAD interesting!

Comment is about John Embley (poet profile)

Original item by John Embley

ooh yes, I too got the shivers down the spine. I've walked winter hill in a blizzard with my teenager nephew. One of the rare occasions I've bailed out of a walk, and only then with the compass in constant use.

Comment is about Ghosts of Rivington Moor (blog)

Original item by Jeffarama!

Too true, too true!

Comment is about Neil F (blurred from Pedigree) (photo)

Cheeky! More like the shaking hand of The Guinness Man.

Comment is about Neil F (blurred from Pedigree) (photo)

Ha - I LOVE this! I make a point of never visiting male doctors anymore - ever since I embarrased one and he embarrased me.

Female doctors are wonderful with their own - know exactly where you are coming from. Though mine confessed to me that she was sick of looking at female bums all day - apparently us women save all those icky problems for the female GPs!

Back to the poem. I love the humour - love the humanity in it. The ending is classic. We should all write poems about bad experiences with doctors...

I wish there was a female equivelant for viagra - if there were I bet many marriages would be saved.

Comment is about The Medical Examination (blog)

I'm actually a well established tap dancer in parts of Asia. Yeah I see what ya mean with good or bad being a matter of perception. But I've been rejected by pretty much every small press publisher in this hemisphere. Thats what I meant with reguards to my stuff and yeah I've tried a few different styles. Cinquain, syllabic but I try not get too engaged in one style as diversity keeps it interesting, if not for anyone else then for meself at least.

Comment is about Laura Taylor (poet profile)

Original item by Laura Taylor

Yes - Anthony picked me up on lens the first time round. I changed it but forgot to amend it on the version I lifted from word. Have just done it now!

Perhaps 'this triangle' would have been better. I guess they were a straight line till I joined them. x

Comment is about The School Play (Re-post) (blog)

Original item by Isobel

Thank you all - yes this does stir memories of all those school plays - and we've all watched or been in them!

The idea I was trying to convey with those lines Ray was that, being on my own, I had to muscle in on someone else's happy family and that out of kindness/ civility I was being included. 'But every man plays his part..' belongs really to the lines that follow it. I am playing along by pretending to be interested in their child, when in fact I only give a hoot for my own - human nature I'm afraid...

There is an accepted form at all these school plays - it involves congratulating other parents on the achievements of their children - no matter how unfair you think it is that your own prodigy didn't get to shine more.

Most school plays are indeciperable to me. Lots of the words are swallowed cos they are children, afer all. Add to that the fact that my mind wanders...

Comment is about The School Play (Re-post) (blog)

Original item by Isobel

Hi Laura -- thanks for commenting on 'Eye of the Beholder' -- I've just been on MSN chat with my daughter in Canada, who did ecology at Bangor, and she reckons she has a book on the Gaia theory left in our loft, so I'll go take a peek this weekend, and see if I can find it. I've heard of it, of course, but my background's mainly maths, engineering and physics, so I've tended to steer clear of such stuff, until recently, p'raps when I started feeling poetic, eh?.
Ta for the pointer!

Comment is about Laura Taylor (poet profile)

Original item by Laura Taylor

This is such a great poem, Isobel!
Every time I read it, another memory jumps out -- and so true! Similar things happened for all 3 of our sproglets years ago!
Nuthin' changes ...
I got to be a candle, I recall, and forgot my words, nearly 60 years ago -- doesn't time fly?

Comment is about The School Play (Re-post) (blog)

Original item by Isobel

You're right, Isobel, I like this one better.In fact, it's a poem that gets better as it goes along.
Not sure Bugsy Malone could be described as having an indecipherable plot.
I didn't understand this bit:
A foisted corner to their triangle
Because everyone
Is
So nice
But each man plays a part…

was this written during your cryptic period?
The last verse is great, I think, but then I'm an old softie. It's lens, though, not lense.

Comment is about The School Play (Re-post) (blog)

Original item by Isobel

ooOOoo I got goosebumps reading this!!! Powerful stuff Jeff - really captures the haunting windswept nature of the place. Wow!

That last line is a killer!

Comment is about Ghosts of Rivington Moor (blog)

Original item by Jeffarama!

Hi again - thanks for replying so soon

What do you think defines 'good' though? Or 'bad'? And who are you going to take that from - yourself, or others? And then...which others? Beware of deification! You have a powerful imagination and intellect - it's not about being better, or worse. It's about your words.

Have you tried writing within certain structures like, say, haiku, ghazal, the diamond stuff that Cynthia is playing with at the mo?

I know what you mean about certain styles being easier to write in. I find that a lot of mine end up being in a musical rhythm - trying to fight against it all the time but it falls out that way. I use haikus to break me out of it.

I think you need to be more courageous about your own work, to recognise if it FEELS good when you write and read it. All the ideas and imagery you're packing in at the moment - it's dense as fuck. You must surely see some merit in that?

Anyhow - keep on writing - not that you could do anything else, I'm sure ;)

Comment is about Kealan Coady (poet profile)

Original item by Kealan Coady

Jeff/Dave
Fraternal greetings and deep respect from a fellow sufferer.

Comment is about The Ghost of White Hart Lane (blog)

Original item by John Coopey

Thanks for the comments laura. Im just not a very good editor. Im not sure whats good and whats not. So I just throw them up here. I kinda try out a few different styles, this one at the moment seems easy to write so I'm gunna stay on it. But thanks again for the comments.

Comment is about Laura Taylor (poet profile)

Original item by Laura Taylor

Fair enough - works perfectly well in that way :)

Comment is about Untitled1# (blog)

It really is an interesting form, and I enjoyed this much more than the cat one...you've captured the best of one of my most exciting places (or three rather!).

Might well have a go at one of these myself.

Comment is about Ocean Thoughts (blog)

Original item by Cynthia Buell Thomas

I'm really liking these recent pieces of yours Kealan. Would be interested to know if you like them too as in your biog you reckon you think you're shit. Would also be nice to know I'm not just sending my comments into the ether.

This is really evocative - I felt like winter morning, loving the reference to M theory as well...in fact, was only looking at that yesterday when writing my mirror poem.

Typo in the spelling of disappeared - one 's', two 'p's

Love these lines: The pull and tuck influence

Of words falling from your lips

Like animals from a ridge.


You are packing an awful lot of ideas and imagery in these recent poems - nice one

Comment is about Foreverless (blog)

Original item by Kealan Coady

Ooo I like this Andy, some cracking lines in it.

Little typo - there's a surplus 's' in aimlessly

This is an interesting line: 'and the chaos of the severed sun'. It sounds GREAT, and I think it refers to the setting sun being chopped up by the silhouette of the pier, and the way it fractures the light into your eyes so you have trouble seeing properly. That's what it feels like to me anyway.

Love it

Comment is about Ticket to Ride (Blackpool Mystery) (blog)

Original item by Andy N

Hahaa!! Nice one Ray - although you cheated and made it funny ;p

I really enjoyed this, the dialogue, the quick bit of memory lane, or Park Drive, ;) The mechanics of the testing, and that last line - excellent finish :D

'I shall have to put you down
as impotent, I'm afraid.
I take it like a man.
And what do you do for exercise?
I smile at her and she smiles back.'

^ comedy gold :D

Comment is about The Medical Examination (blog)

And there are some, like James Lovelock, who theorise that the earth itself, and all the organisms that live in and on it, are a part of a complex system of organisms, all working together to keep the earth alive and as healthy as it can be. Have you read about the Gaia theory? Worth reading alongside this.

Interesting poem, interesting questions :)

Comment is about Eye of the Beholder (blog)

Original item by John Embley

Cheers Dave, honesty is very important to me in all things.

Glad you liked the piece xXx

Comment is about Dave Bradley (poet profile)

Original item by Dave Bradley

Just read the Glass Conch - love it!

So few words to convey so much, "And as the tide departs, hushhh"

Comment is about Winston Plowes (poet profile)

Original item by Winston Plowes

Hey Win, thanks for commenting on The Changeling.

I wrote it to express my concerns and I'm glad to say that thanks to the feedback at performances, I've had them addressed and I do know that desire comes not only from hormonal rushes but also from what a person sees and feels :)

Comment is about Winston Plowes (poet profile)

Original item by Winston Plowes

Cheers Laura for commenting on The Changeling. I'm a dizzy sod at times; have to park my car in the same few places in a multi-storey, always leave my keys in the hall & I do wonder of I'll remember where I live once I've been through the menopause!

There's a fear for me of losing my womanliness too - lots more things than I conveyed in the poem which focused on female sexuality.

Anyway, thanks again, glad you enjoyed it xXx

Comment is about Laura Taylor (poet profile)

Original item by Laura Taylor

Hi Isobel

Thanks for commenting on The Changeling. I'm not there yet, it's something I've been wondering about - what affect will these changes have? And interestingly, each time I've performed it, women have spoken to me and answered some of my questions :)

Comment is about Isobel (poet profile)

Original item by Isobel

Hi Dave, thanks so much for your comment on Ghosts of Rivington Moor, enjoyed writing it, good to know it had the desired effect on you. It's quite fascinating in a barren way but there's a lot to it. Not been up there for a while but always like the experience, as for those new fandangled GPS things, well, yes could probably need one if weather was that bad! Hope to see you soon mate Jeff

Comment is about Dave Bradley (poet profile)

Original item by Dave Bradley

Just been reading a book on the 'Anthropic Cosmological Principle', which seems to argue, in its strongest case, that the Universe exists as it does because we're in it ... I can't quite get my head around that one, so wrote this, trying to reason it out ...

Comment is about Eye of the Beholder (blog)

Original item by John Embley

Enjoyed this John. I still remember the sense of shock at John White's death - he was a great player in a great team. I saw Spurs beat Sheffield Wednesday 4-0 7th April 1962 and wish I could remember more about the day - I think he was playing but Google won't confirm.

Dave (Evertonian)

Comment is about The Ghost of White Hart Lane (blog)

Original item by John Coopey

I can't remember one of yours that I've liked as much Jeff (doesn't mean there isn't one, I've got a rotten memory). I go up on the hills in these sort of conditions and am barmy enough to enjoy it and it really brought memories to life for me. Excellent!

PS You could try a GPS unit but maybe the poetry would suffer

Comment is about Ghosts of Rivington Moor (blog)

Original item by Jeffarama!

Found this and thought it excellent then noticed you posting another one as I write, which is completely different - experimental. Both of them work for me.

Comment is about Quoting Mikey Wong: "Poetry Is Gay" (blog)

Original item by Gemma Lees

Hi Amy, like the two part thing, some great lines as I would expect from you, now you had best get some gardening done! See ya soon Jeff X

Comment is about Death of a Thistle (part2) (blog)

Original item by Amy McCawley