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Ameya.

Mon 24th Jul 2017 23:59

yup, boredom is indeed a silent torturous killer, it tends to suffocate the mind. Well this is surely a good write much of the outlet of everyday boredom... Liked it though ?

Comment is about Frustration and Boredom (blog)

Original item by Regan Roberts

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Harry O'Neill

Mon 24th Jul 2017 21:46

Regan,
Your picture reminds me that they cladded the tower-block where I spent ten years of my married life Just a few months ago...and are already taking it off.

Comment is about The Gentrification Scheme 2017 (blog)

Original item by Regan Roberts

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Harry O'Neill

Mon 24th Jul 2017 21:28

Thanks folks

Comment is about The night battle (blog)

Original item by Harry O`N eill

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John Coopey

Mon 24th Jul 2017 21:19

It's what they used to fetch your coal in, Harry.

Comment is about REGRETS (blog)

Original item by John Coopey

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Harry O'Neill

Mon 24th Jul 2017 21:11

Sex?...sex?...sex...Hmm....sex?...No, No!...don`t tell me...It`s back there somewhere!...Now, what exactly was it...???

Comment is about REGRETS (blog)

Original item by John Coopey

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Harry O'Neill

Mon 24th Jul 2017 21:00

Ray,
I like the poignancy in that `those` and `could have been` in the last stanza...Also the truth in lines seventeen and eighteen.

(not to forget the neatly stanzed shape)

Comment is about VARIETY ARTISTS (blog)

Original item by ray pool

Jo Rose

Mon 24th Jul 2017 19:15

I love this poem Leon!! Well done to you ?

Comment is about 'Skiffle' by Leon Stolgard is Write Out Loud's Poem of the Week (article)

Original item by Greg Freeman

Regan Roberts

Mon 24th Jul 2017 19:03

Well, I don't overly share your opinion but it certainly does put a different spin on things for me. ?

Comment is about Just trying to help. (blog)

Original item by Harry O`N eill

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Maxine

Mon 24th Jul 2017 17:57

This line is very powerful: "In mind, body and soul, living to compliment"

Comment is about One plus one makes two (blog)

Original item by Louis Audet

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M.C. Newberry

Mon 24th Jul 2017 16:27

Good craic, Harry. I can just imagine the twinkle in your
eye when writing this chuckle-friendly flight of fancy.

Comment is about The girl at the dance in a sari (blog)

Original item by Harry O`N eill

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M.C. Newberry

Mon 24th Jul 2017 16:12

The content and its message are timeless in the context
of growing up and each generation seems to need the
lesson taught and heeded - or dangerously disregarded.
The young can think they know it all
Cinderellas at the ball.
When self-deception comes to call
Pride and pain precede the fall.

Comment is about Growing Up (blog)

Original item by Eileen

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M.C. Newberry

Mon 24th Jul 2017 16:04

A reminder that behind the laughter lies the sadness of
thwarted hopes and ambitions...the two faces immortalised
in a famous theatrical mask. The "lines" cleverly cross the visual and the verbal in this particular context.
I'm reminded of a photo I took of my sister which I like a
lot - but she doesn't...because (altho' she won't say) it shows very visible "laughter lines" stretching away from her
eyes as she smiles. Vanity, vanity...all is vanity!

Comment is about VARIETY ARTISTS (blog)

Original item by ray pool

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Raj Ferds

Mon 24th Jul 2017 15:36

This is Soo-oo sensuous Cynthia.

I actually read the last 8 lines again and again.
The assorted smells of that 'ol barn still lingers.

Lucky cow 'tis Flora Jean!

Raj

Comment is about The Farmer's Wife (blog)

Original item by Cynthia Buell Thomas

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Raj Ferds

Mon 24th Jul 2017 15:01

Colin's suggestion is spot on. If we're talking chillies then we'll need chilled beer for sure. So count me in. I'll be there with a slab under my arm.

Salivatig already!
Raj

Comment is about Do I smell funny? (blog)

Original item by Wonderer

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Raj Ferds

Mon 24th Jul 2017 14:45

Beautiful Tiffany. There's a certain softness to it that I like.

As someone who meditates I can tell you that solitude can brig out the splendour in you. Aloneness should not be confused with loneliness I have to say.

Try and bask in solitude from time to time and watch you dance begin. Is this a series?

Raj

Comment is about Solitude (blog)

Original item by Tiffany Wright

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Raj Ferds

Mon 24th Jul 2017 14:41

I find this quite appealing Charlotte. There seems to be a certain reality about it? A purge of pent up emotions perhaps, a tinge of jealousy, sending out a message.

Got another one?

Raj

Comment is about Written whilst listening to Sam Smith: I'm not the only one (blog)

Original item by Charlotte Colvin

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Raj Ferds

Mon 24th Jul 2017 14:32

I like the intensity of this offering Eileen. There is a clear intellectual and moral honesty to it. You speak for many and that has tremendous value.

Look forward o the next one!
Raj

Comment is about Growing Up (blog)

Original item by Eileen

Charlotte Colvin

Mon 24th Jul 2017 14:32

This is beautiful

Comment is about Rust (blog)

Original item by MyDystopiA

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raypool

Mon 24th Jul 2017 13:44

Great stuff Suki. To disentangle the core from this would be pointless - it feels like The Masque of the Red Death by Poe (and the film in particular) with its shifting colours and threats. Very enjoyable.

Ray

Comment is about And The Heretics Weep (blog)

Original item by Suki Spangles

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Lynn Dye

Mon 24th Jul 2017 13:36

It is indeed a powerful poem and straight from the heart. Welcome to WOL, Eileen.

Comment is about Growing Up (blog)

Original item by Eileen

patricia Hughes

Mon 24th Jul 2017 12:42

Powerful poem.

Comment is about Growing Up (blog)

Original item by Eileen

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Eileen

Mon 24th Jul 2017 12:23

Thank you for your comment. While I do like the original I have in my sample, I have been experimenting with this poem. The longer version emphasizes the positive vibes I want in the world. The shorter version is the one that captures the pain of the situation.

Comment is about Cynthia Buell Thomas (poet profile)

Original item by Cynthia Buell Thomas

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Cynthia Buell Thomas

Mon 24th Jul 2017 12:03

I would include the final lines as you have them in your Bio, although the starkness of this version is very intense. Perhaps the omission is on purpose.

Comment is about Growing Up (blog)

Original item by Eileen

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Cynthia Buell Thomas

Mon 24th Jul 2017 12:01

A gripping and effective poem. Welcome to WOL.

Comment is about Eileen (poet profile)

Original item by Eileen

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Raj Ferds

Mon 24th Jul 2017 06:44

Thank you so much Wardah for your observations. Quite perceptive.

I look forward to your next contribution.

Take care
Raj

Comment is about She blows hot, blows cold (blog)

Original item by Chakraj

Frances Macaulay Forde

Mon 24th Jul 2017 02:17

I agree.
So clever and beautifully atmospheric:

"Three sloe-eyed cats sleek with mice and milk

sit and mewl, and they wait

strategically short of an irritated hoof."

and

"She heaves her heavy skirts up and aside

baring her ankle boots, her knees, almost her thighs..."

Comment is about The Farmer's Wife (blog)

Original item by Cynthia Buell Thomas

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John Coopey

Mon 24th Jul 2017 00:27

What was in my dad's mind in his final years was a movable feast, MC. His head was a shed.

Comment is about REGRETS (blog)

Original item by John Coopey

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M.C. Newberry

Mon 24th Jul 2017 00:22

I recall John Betjeman making a similar comment to his
biographer - only he put it as wishing he'd had more sex.
Funny how the imagination can embroider the reality to
omit the rest of what can go with it! But then, it's all in
the mind anyway, isn't it?

Comment is about REGRETS (blog)

Original item by John Coopey

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Ameya.

Mon 24th Jul 2017 00:22

thank you ? Appreciate your words ?

Comment is about Ameya. (poet profile)

Original item by Ameya.

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John Coopey

Sun 23rd Jul 2017 23:46

Good to see your success with the ladies transcends boundaries, Harry.

Comment is about The girl at the dance in a sari (blog)

Original item by Harry O`N eill

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John Coopey

Sun 23rd Jul 2017 23:41

I could get more worked up about this if I hadn't had ISAs in the past, or my redundancy payment wasn't taxed, or my pension lump sum, or my donations to the charity shops weren't. But I'm totally in favour of more stringent controls for others.

Comment is about I'm Alright Jacks (blog)

Original item by Wendy Higson

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Wardah

Sun 23rd Jul 2017 23:15

Enjoyed your comparison of women to natures changing seasons its completely apt. And if only more people knew how to ride that wave with patience and acceptance there would certainly be more lasting relationships.

Looking out for your next piece.

Take care.
Wardah

Comment is about She blows hot, blows cold (blog)

Original item by Chakraj

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Wardah

Sun 23rd Jul 2017 23:05

Hi Raj

Thank u very much for the kind words. There will be more to come Godwilling when time allows. ?

Keep well.

Comment is about I dream only of You (blog)

Original item by Wardah

<Deleted User> (17847)

Sun 23rd Jul 2017 18:56

stand-out lines? last four for me?

Comment is about Retreat (blog)

Original item by MyDystopiA

<Deleted User> (9882)

Sun 23rd Jul 2017 17:00

Although I have said competitions are not my bag I can see they are yours,and I can also see why you deserve to have been chosen.

It is such wonderful poem.

Congrats are in order!


Rose ?

Comment is about 'Skiffle' by Leon Stolgard is Write Out Loud's Poem of the Week (article)

Original item by Greg Freeman

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raypool

Sun 23rd Jul 2017 16:48

I will go with instinct to say I don't think you are referring to an actual leak on a mundane level. A leak internally is quite a different thing - is it psychological or physical? Always you present us with options.

Great stuff as always Rachel.

Comment is about paths home (blog)

Original item by nunya

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raypool

Sun 23rd Jul 2017 16:45

Fabulous Cynthia. Really so together in a great swathe of loving attention - there is no mistaking the scene and all that goes into it. It is really a painting in words!

Ray

Comment is about The Farmer's Wife (blog)

Original item by Cynthia Buell Thomas

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raypool

Sun 23rd Jul 2017 16:42

I'm with you there Mark. But like the wailing wall every little helps!

Ray

Comment is about SOLITARY (blog)

Original item by M.C. Newberry

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raypool

Sun 23rd Jul 2017 16:32

THanks for your thoughts Suki. Fear itself as you imply is often enough to break us down, always plenty of it about in society. It's also for others to bear the burden of worry in a case like this one.

Ray

Comment is about SANCTUARY (blog)

Original item by ray pool

Jemima Jones

Sun 23rd Jul 2017 15:03

oh! well done to the new boy.I'm over the moon for you Leon.Will we see you at some time in the future returning to pole position? Doubtlessly! Thank you.Jemima.

Comment is about 'Skiffle' by Leon Stolgard is Write Out Loud's Poem of the Week (article)

Original item by Greg Freeman

Jemima Jones

Sun 23rd Jul 2017 14:38

but will the answer to your last sentence ever be forthcoming Wendy? Not if the 'I'm alright Jacks' can help it.Thank you.Jemima.

Comment is about I'm Alright Jacks (blog)

Original item by Wendy Higson

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Cynthia Buell Thomas

Sun 23rd Jul 2017 12:42

I like this. Great title. I'm not sure why you need to 'stretch' it so much. I would enjoy it even more in the simple couplets that they are. Or - maybe- it's different voices! Ah, that would work.

Comment is about Script Confusion (blog)

Original item by Robert C Gaulke

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Cynthia Buell Thomas

Sun 23rd Jul 2017 12:25

I like this a lot. The last four lines are superb.

Are you familiar with the mysticism of 'the White Owl' in the cultural tales of the Original Inhabitants of North America? Very interesting.

Comment is about Retreat (blog)

Original item by MyDystopiA

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Cynthia Buell Thomas

Sun 23rd Jul 2017 12:19

This is a fine poem, personally gripping and hard-hitting. It highlights so clearly a situation that could belong to any one of us, in our ignorance, or selfishness. A very good 'heads up'.

Comment is about The Consultant (Revelation, first draft) (blog)

Original item by Chris Armstrong

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Cynthia Buell Thomas

Sun 23rd Jul 2017 12:08

I've not read it before; I'm sure I'd remember it! It's super!

Comment is about The girl at the dance in a sari (blog)

Original item by Harry O`N eill

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Julian (Admin)

Sun 23rd Jul 2017 11:48

Wonderful poem, Leon, with that regretful air juxtaposed with the ongoing beat. Bebopallula (sp?)

Comment is about 'Skiffle' by Leon Stolgard is Write Out Loud's Poem of the Week (article)

Original item by Greg Freeman

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Cynthia Buell Thomas

Sun 23rd Jul 2017 11:43

Delightful piece! A subject common to us all. And in couplets! What's not to love?

Comment is about Do I smell funny? (blog)

Original item by Wonderer

<Deleted User> (13762)

Sun 23rd Jul 2017 11:42

and it lasts a whole 7 days which has to be better than Warhol's suggested 15 minutes. Enjoy ?

Comment is about 'Skiffle' by Leon Stolgard is Write Out Loud's Poem of the Week (article)

Original item by Greg Freeman

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Cynthia Buell Thomas

Sun 23rd Jul 2017 11:36

This work came from 'trug', a word I simply tripped over yesterday; and the poem came out wholly formed as if I were some kind of 'medium'. It made me feel a bit weird, but unbelievably happy.

I don't know what the last line really means either, although I have my suspicions.

Comment is about The Farmer's Wife (blog)

Original item by Cynthia Buell Thomas

<Deleted User> (17847)

Sun 23rd Jul 2017 11:12

Thanks be to the judges for giving me my first ever association with a taste of fame.

Comment is about 'Skiffle' by Leon Stolgard is Write Out Loud's Poem of the Week (article)

Original item by Greg Freeman

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