Donations are essential to keep Write Out Loud going    

Profile image

Greg Freeman

Mon 22nd Jul 2013 14:44

You're right, Ann, there ought to be a poem there, down in the stream somewhere. Maybe we should all try thinking of poems about where we grew up, within or without London.

Comment is about London Lines poets - with a little help from us - map out the city (article)

Original item by Greg Freeman

Profile image

Ann Foxglove

Mon 22nd Jul 2013 13:56

"My hands are rebels" - great! I too have practical hands, like my father's. I like them!

Comment is about You've got the whole world in your hands (article)

Original item by Greg Freeman

Profile image

Pete Slater

Mon 22nd Jul 2013 13:55

Brilliant mate. From one rib cager to another ....brilliant mate. "Hairdryer on suck ... you fat cheeky fuck" love it. Would like to see it performed fella' ... LOADS of emotions in there ..

“The Truth” said the sun, those poor families they read
How we robbed off our own and we pissed on our dead.

AAAAAARGGGGHH!!!! If that doesn't wake people up then fuck all will do. Well written mate.
It's a disgrace that any one could try and score political points from such a tragedy, it makes me sick to my stomach that the authorities tried to cover up their own incompetence by blaming the victims. When you have that street banquet, save me a slice. ;0)

Comment is about More than 50 (blog)

Original item by Ged Thompson

Profile image

Ann Foxglove

Mon 22nd Jul 2013 13:53

Sounds a lovely idea! Also, Ophelia and the tadpoles - a poem in there surely?

Comment is about London Lines poets - with a little help from us - map out the city (article)

Original item by Greg Freeman

<Deleted User> (9882)

Mon 22nd Jul 2013 13:32

WOWSERS!!and then some.x

Comment is about One Year Apart (blog)

Original item by Katy Megan

Profile image

Emlyn

Mon 22nd Jul 2013 12:09

Jolly good show Sir ! Excellent and eloquent political comment Mr Thompson.

One can see that your parochial education system still produces insightful poetry despite the fact that there is a lack of public school provision in the area.

Comment is about More than 50 (blog)

Original item by Ged Thompson

Profile image

Laura Taylor

Mon 22nd Jul 2013 11:45

Lots I liked in this Dave

Comment is about Death (blog)

Original item by Dave Bradley

Profile image

Laura Taylor

Mon 22nd Jul 2013 11:44

Ferocious. Well said, Ged.

Comment is about More than 50 (blog)

Original item by Ged Thompson

Profile image

Isobel

Mon 22nd Jul 2013 10:21

'an embarrassment of riches'

Now I'll comment on the comments! I can't think of a better way to describe your poem than what Graham has said - it's stuffed full of richness.

'the sonic boom of unfinished business'

What a great way to close and to express such a relationship!

Love it!

Comment is about One Year Apart (blog)

Original item by Katy Megan

Profile image

Isobel

Mon 22nd Jul 2013 10:15

Wow Ged - this takes your breath away. I love the title - it's very powerful in its understatement - as the whole poem is powerful in it's anger.

When tragedies like this happen, it beggars belief that people can't see beyond party politics and petty allegiances, to the heart of the issue - that they just can't look through a parent's eyes.

Shame on the lot of them - and all those who peddled lies.

Comment is about More than 50 (blog)

Original item by Ged Thompson

Profile image

Isobel

Mon 22nd Jul 2013 10:07

Hi Dave - could you try to get to September Tudor please, so you can pick up your prize from the 52 Hertz competition :) x

Comment is about Dave Bradley (poet profile)

Original item by Dave Bradley

Profile image

Isobel

Mon 22nd Jul 2013 09:51

If you want your third prize (an inflatable toy ;) then email me your address :)

Comment is about John Coopey (poet profile)

Original item by John Coopey

Profile image

Isobel

Mon 22nd Jul 2013 09:50

Hi Rachel - I'd love to get you one of those lovely little ornaments but when I've priced them up they are hundreds of pounds. But don't worry - I'll get you the nearest thing I can afford - they come a lot cheaper in plastic!

Look forward to seeing you soon. x

Comment is about Rachel Bond (poet profile)

Original item by Rachel Bond

Profile image

Isobel

Mon 22nd Jul 2013 09:49

Hi Rachel - I'd love to get you one of those lovely little ornaments but when I've priced them up they are hundreds of pounds. But don't worry - I'll get you the nearest thing I can afford - they come a lot cheaper in plastic!

Look forward to seeing you soon. x

Comment is about 52 Hertz Competition Results (blog)

Original item by Isobel

Profile image

Ann Foxglove

Mon 22nd Jul 2013 09:42

Hi Sarah - welcome to WOL. Hope you enjoy exploring the site. :)

Comment is about Sarah James (poet profile)

Original item by Sarah James

Profile image

Ann Foxglove

Mon 22nd Jul 2013 09:41

Hmmm - I tend to agree (about the hovering!) Hope you'll put some more poems on here soon - housework related or not!

Comment is about Gareth Glyn Roberts (poet profile)

Original item by Gareth Glyn Roberts

Profile image

Ann Foxglove

Mon 22nd Jul 2013 09:29

Hi Andy - welcome to WOL. What a powerful poem! You'll find on WOL that more people see work that is posted on the blogs, so I hope you'll do that soon.

Comment is about Andy Hickmott (poet profile)

Original item by Andy Hickmott

Profile image

Starfish

Mon 22nd Jul 2013 09:25

Bravo! Very well put!
Do things really change, though, as the powers that be continue in the same vein vilifying the unemployed and disabled, etc.
Starfish

Comment is about More than 50 (blog)

Original item by Ged Thompson

Profile image

Dave Bradley

Mon 22nd Jul 2013 08:12

I like this. It's made me think, feel and remember all in one go. Think about the many issues connected with Welsh history, and the building of castles by both English and Welsh.
Feel a little of what it means to be Welsh. And remember many happy holidays and outings in that fascinating country. Thank you.

Comment is about CASTLES (blog)

Original item by David Subacchi

Profile image

Dave Bradley

Mon 22nd Jul 2013 08:05

Totally understand the anger, Ged. Blues and Reds have been united on this, and, at last, the truth of it all is out there, although still with more to come. Boris' popularity is deeply worrying. He has some achievements as mayor, and a little boy mischievousness, which make people think he is trustworthy. Not a bit of it.

Comment is about More than 50 (blog)

Original item by Ged Thompson

Profile image

M.C. Newberry

Sun 21st Jul 2013 23:40

A long time ago now, I wrote some lines about
looking in the mirror and reflecting...
"You can still say "I have me" - so I have some
rapport with the sentiment you expressed in "Yourself".
As for "Life", I have commented on your post page.
Keep them coming.

Comment is about Steve Higgins (poet profile)

Original item by Steve Higgins

Profile image

M.C. Newberry

Sun 21st Jul 2013 23:28

Ha! Know the feeling.
At the beginning there ain't no sinning,
But we wind up dead when ours sins are red.

Comment is about Life (blog)

Original item by Steve Higgins

Profile image

David Subacchi

Sun 21st Jul 2013 21:53

You can find more of my poetry by searching on line for SUBACCHI+POETRY.

Comment is about CASTLES (blog)

Original item by David Subacchi

Profile image

Ian Whiteley

Sun 21st Jul 2013 20:12

many thanks for your kind comments regarding 'natural selection' Francine - It was an enjoyable experience trying to work that train-rhythm into the words and i'm pretty pleased with the result - I'm glad you liked it :-)
Ian

Comment is about Francine (poet profile)

Original item by Francine

Profile image

Ian Whiteley

Sun 21st Jul 2013 20:10

hi Cynthia
thanks for your useful and considered views regarding 'natural selection'. I sort of get what you mean about the second stanza - so may revisit it at some point in the future - as a few of the rhythms do get a bit 'clunky'. Glad you liked it though
Ian

Comment is about Cynthia Buell Thomas (poet profile)

Original item by Cynthia Buell Thomas

Profile image

Starfish

Sun 21st Jul 2013 15:56

Love this too.
Starfish

Comment is about Life (blog)

Original item by Steve Higgins

Profile image

Dave Bradley

Sun 21st Jul 2013 14:50

Wow. Totally agree with Graham. Many published poems have nothing like this inventiveness or facility with words.

Comment is about One Year Apart (blog)

Original item by Katy Megan

Profile image

M.C. Newberry

Sun 21st Jul 2013 14:35

Anyone who has "raced" on a bike will enjoy (if
that is the appropriate word - a bit like the
pedalling itself) this post. I did.

Comment is about Tour de France- Versailles / Paris Champs-Élysées (blog)

Original item by Tommy Carroll

Profile image

Graham Sherwood

Sun 21st Jul 2013 13:54

Katy there are so many clever words and phrases in this lovely piece that it is an embarrassment of riches. The first thing that I have read on here for ages that has made me read through several times. Well done, clever girl!

regards, Graham

Comment is about One Year Apart (blog)

Original item by Katy Megan

<Deleted User> (10832)

Sun 21st Jul 2013 13:07

Keep on going till you wind up dead. That's one way of getting thro the day I suppose.

I sometimes think to myself that life isn't everything - in fact I think I should write some song lyrics about that.

Thanks for the inspiration. I will try not to plagurise you.

Comment is about Life (blog)

Original item by Steve Higgins

Profile image

Rachel Bond

Sun 21st Jul 2013 00:32

isobel...can i have that lovely dolphin ornament?

Comment is about 52 Hertz Competition Results (blog)

Original item by Isobel

Profile image

Jon

Sat 20th Jul 2013 23:35

Great poem David! Unbelievably good first stanza!
By the way thanks for comments posted a couple of months back!

Comment is about From A High Window (blog)

Original item by David Blake

Profile image

John Coopey

Sat 20th Jul 2013 23:11

Good to see you embrace the personal responsibility at the end, Ian. It amuses me so much when folks bleat about the stuff going on around them and don't recognise their own role in it all.
A friend of mine who lives in York was bemoaning that a corner shop near them had been put out of business by the opening of a supermarket nearby. I asked if they shopped there. No, she said; they used the supermarket!

Comment is about GRATITUDE (blog)

Original item by Ian Gant

Profile image

Isobel

Sat 20th Jul 2013 19:38

I can understand that one Steve. The grammar schools were set up to produce university candidates - those teachers didn't up and leave once they became called comprehensives, nor did the systems they had in place disintegrate.

Our grammar school went on to become a sixth form college (the one I went to) - it was and still is one of the best in the country - if you can believe the statistics.

The problem with the comprehensive system is the size of the schools. I think you lose something when a school gets too big - they become harder to manage. The whole ability to discipline pupils has also been eroded over the years. There's no immediate punishment for anything. Even if you give a pupil detention it involves a lot of hassle and parents having to be notified in advance. I think to get your kids a decent education, you have to get them into a decent area, where education is valued. Either that or hope that they can be single minded enough to ignore all the distractions.

I could be talking out of my arse though - these are just thoughts that occur to me. I don't teach in a secondary school - it's just what I surmise.

Comment is about The Eleven-Plus (blog)

Original item by Greg Freeman

Profile image

Francine

Sat 20th Jul 2013 18:50

This is very insightful. Anyone who has travelled regularly on a train can relate, and feel this. Your poem is cleverly set up to look and feel like a train - creativity at its best!

Comment is about Natural Selection (blog)

Original item by Ian Whiteley

Profile image

Francine

Sat 20th Jul 2013 18:42

Enjoyed reading this. I love how you've entwined the metaphor of 'Dragon Husband' - full of personality and interesting imagery into this fairy-tale like poem.

Comment is about My Dragon Husband (blog)

Original item by Freda Davis

Profile image

Freda Davis

Sat 20th Jul 2013 18:26

A landmark indeed.

Comment is about Write Out Loud's Gig Guide notches up 10,000 events (article)

Original item by Greg Freeman

Profile image

Harry O'Neill

Sat 20th Jul 2013 16:06


Ian,
The class consciousness of that `Like Churchill smoking woodbines` would on its own banish you from the ranks of the genuinely
proletarian protestors.

You`ve got to get a bit of heat into it!

The rhyming (as always) is good.

Comment is about GRATITUDE (blog)

Original item by Ian Gant

Profile image

Harry O'Neill

Sat 20th Jul 2013 14:59

Freda,

What a marvellously cool and observational (and aptly anthropomorpic) assesment of a husband.

The impressive thing is not that there is any word of praise in it (there isn`t) but that there is no word of condemnation either.

I feel quite sure that (within walls) you were able to sort the man out no problem.

(And that you loved the bones of each other)

Comment is about My Dragon Husband (blog)

Original item by Freda Davis

Profile image

Cynthia Buell Thomas

Sat 20th Jul 2013 14:11

I'm with Dave. for sure. I found the 'going to the interview' a bit more structured than 'the return', which would actually be quite natural. Maybe it's the 'onion' metaphor that takes a bit more imagination on my part. I found the rhythm faltered just a bit; and I had become quite pampered by its dependability. I enjoyed the poem very much, especially the contrast of the protagonist's perception of the same scene and persons. And the sly reality of 'rehearsing each spontaneous line'.

Comment is about Natural Selection (blog)

Original item by Ian Whiteley

Profile image

M.C. Newberry

Sat 20th Jul 2013 13:47

When I think of parental expectations and subsequent disappointments, I think about a certain Winston Spencer Churchill and his own scholastic failures. But his reduced ambitions led to him joining the army in which he obtained invaluable experience for the life to come - including his monumental literary achievements. He saw life as an ongoing learning experience, free from the handcuffs of a few short years of childhood. There are others less notable whose "failure" as school was no bar to future success in adult life. Which takes me back to my belief in the ongoing acquisition of knowledge beyond the "parrot-fashion" parameters of juvenile learning. The tragedy of the 11-plus system was its arbitrary disposal of young minds that - with more time - were likely to develop and offer untapped creativity and skills to the benefit of a society that was so short-sighted in its educational references and values. I hear that NHS nurses have to be "graduate" level nowadays- this at a time when the reputation
of patient care has never been so low...with numerous
horror stories to prove the case. Can certain essential
occupations lose track in a grotesque search for
"qualifications"? It would certainly seem so today.

Comment is about The Eleven-Plus (blog)

Original item by Greg Freeman

Profile image

Steve Higgins

Sat 20th Jul 2013 10:19

Isobel- some interesting points there. I went to a comprehensive school that was previously a secondary modern and my best friend went to a comprehensive that was previously a grammar school. he ended up at university and I left at 16 with 4 o levels. My friend was of more or less similar intelligence to me but I do feel he had a significant advantage in life just by his choice of schools.
Greg- you've certainly caused a stir with your work!

Comment is about The Eleven-Plus (blog)

Original item by Greg Freeman

Profile image

Ian Whiteley

Sat 20th Jul 2013 10:02

Dave
thanks for commenting on 'natural selection' - I had genuinely gone for the train-like rhythm so it made my day that you spotted that - very perceptive of you. glad you liked it mate
Ian

Comment is about Dave Bradley (poet profile)

Original item by Dave Bradley

Profile image

Isobel

Sat 20th Jul 2013 08:04

Steve - I think that's quite common on FB - the same has happened to me with old work colleagues - it's so aggravating, especially when they were the ones to seek you out! It sounds like Greg's friend just felt alienated by Greg's greater success - perhaps less inclined t talk about his own life.

I remember reading an article about twin brothers - one had gone to grammar school and gone on to have a brilliant career - the other had gone to secondary modern to then be a taxi driver. When tested as middle aged adults, they both had the same IQ - but had ended up on such different paths. In some families, whether or not you passed your 11+ (an exam taken for many at 10) affected your parents aspirations for you and your own self belief.

From the sounds of it Grammar schools were different around the country. Ours was mixed. I sometimes regretted not going there because it offered Latin, German, Spanish - subjects I couldn't do at Secondary Modern - and which later I found a big disadvantage not knowing.

Going to Secondary Modern also meant that you couldn't sit an O level syllabus and had to do CSEs which weren't as well respected. To get the key O levels, I had to go to night school for one, give up Careers and P.E. lessons for others and rely on the good will and dedication of those teachers who gave up their spare time and lunch hours to teach us. I was very lucky in that I had some wonderful teachers - it was a rough school, but the teachers were diamonds.

One last anecdote.... when orphaned,my dad was adopted by the next door neighbours. His own aunt and uncle didn't want him because he'd failed his 11+ and they didn't think he'd amount to anything. They were right - a life time of wagon building and working in a factory despite his lifelong love of literature and learning. He made sure his kids amounted to something though - with or without the 11+

Comment is about The Eleven-Plus (blog)

Original item by Greg Freeman

Profile image

Steve Higgins

Sat 20th Jul 2013 07:07

I have a poem on here about my school days 'A schoolboy from 1968' but yours is so much more direct, evocotive and interesting. I can relate to the verse about your best friend. I had a similar experience on 'friends reunited' I was contacted by an old schoolfriend, wrote a long chatty e-mail back and received a reply of about 6 words ending in that most distasteful way with 'LOL' Perhaps school old schoolfriends should stay way back in the past where they belong. Best wishes, Steve

Comment is about The Eleven-Plus (blog)

Original item by Greg Freeman

Profile image

Dave Bradley

Sat 20th Jul 2013 06:45

This is really good Ian. Carries the reader right into the scene and your emotions. The rhythm is train-like

Comment is about Natural Selection (blog)

Original item by Ian Whiteley

Profile image

Steve Higgins

Sat 20th Jul 2013 06:42

Thanks for looking at 'Yourself' MC. Its another one of mine thats not quite right yet. I was feeling rather cynical when I wrote it but sometimes its good to explore ones other side -ones other self-
Steve

Comment is about M.C. Newberry (poet profile)

Original item by M.C. Newberry

Profile image

Greg Freeman

Sat 20th Jul 2013 00:12

I'm really pleased but maybe not too surprised that this poem has prompted so much discussion. I'm still confused about how I feel about it all. But I don't believe in selection at 11, that's for sure. And I would hate to think we're taking any steps back towards that. (Yes, I know there are pockets and whole counties that still have it). All I know is, I was happy at primary school, and pretty miserable at my crummy old grammar school, which had been coasting for literally hundreds of years. I missed the girls, particularly. But maybe you're not meant to be happy at secondary school. Maybe it's all part of 'growing up'.

Comment is about The Eleven-Plus (blog)

Original item by Greg Freeman

Profile image

Ian Whiteley

Fri 19th Jul 2013 22:43

thanks Richard - I really enjoyed myself and it seemed to go down OK - thanks for all your support mate :-)

Comment is about Richard Alfred (poet profile)

Original item by Richard Alfred

Profile image

Isobel

Fri 19th Jul 2013 20:14

I think that might have something to do with the 'Peter principle' Dave - being promoted to your level of incompetence - but sometimes bits of paper ease the way. I think most employers are looking for personality and drive - it will always out-do qualifications in the right kind of interview - it's a question of getting to the interview though - and looking good on paper helps.

In response to you MC - I think any negative experience from childhood sticks with you for life. Hopefully it doesn't blight it and you move on - but you don't forget it. If I were writing poetry about the injustice of a system that penalised me, then there might be room for concern (and for your laughter) - but I'm not - I'm just responding to someone else's poem about a subject I can speak first hand on :)

But hey, thanks for proving my point. Children who weren't academic or interested in studying were not offered the option of trading down to a secondary modern either - so their places and opportunities were wasted - what a crazy system.

Comment is about The Eleven-Plus (blog)

Original item by Greg Freeman

More Comments

◄ Prev123 … 299 … 598 … 897 … 1196 … 1495 … 1794 … 20502051205220532054 … 2093 … 2392 … 2691 … 298629872988Next ►

This site uses cookies. By continuing to browse, you are agreeing to our use of cookies.

Find out more Hide this message