Good poem ; a mans employment should not be what defines him.

Comment is about Unemployed (blog)

Original item by James Roper

glad you enjoyed it anyway. i wanted to write something about my dislike of language nowadays and this seemed to fit.

Comment is about the poet dies (blog)

Original item by Stuart Buck

innit. its a bastardisation of isnt it, although it has now grown to mean 'i agree' and 'honestly'

Comment is about the poet dies (blog)

Original item by Stuart Buck

Ray this is really great. I am absolutely there, in both scenes. You traverese time beautifully with wonderful economy of description too.

Comment is about THE YARDS (blog)

Original item by ray pool

I agree with Natasha,
It is a much more powerful poem as she says.

Comment is about moving towards an unknown universe (blog)

"Natural" and "unnatural" are terms that have been used
to achieve a means of condemning behaviour. It can be
argued with justification that anything that is possible
within the realm of "nature" is natural. As a species,
we have been busily usurping the words "normal" and "usual" with the more sinister connotations contained in natural and unnatural so as to control behaviour we
consider beyond our own personally perceived codes of conduct. A powerful example of how the misuse of words
is intended to aid and abet tyranny in social interaction.

Comment is about Poetry competition questions meanings of 'natural' and 'unnatural' (article)

Original item by Greg Freeman

Good generational mutual misunderstander...emboldenly and normally clear...But I don`t get that `innit`(maybe my age.)

Comment is about the poet dies (blog)

Original item by Stuart Buck

We are now "connected" in this world as never before.
Today's 24 hour "global media" is a mixed blessing bestowing instant acquaintance with wondrous events allied to the horrors of war, murder and misery.
Gun crime says more about those who readily resort to
its use than the weapon itself. There is something
seriously amiss in the mental make-up of many who now
live in a country that has such a high serious-crime rate
that cannot be explained by simply condemning firearms
as "the cause". These are merely tools - that can save when used to defend life & liberty. The mix of mental
illness and drug abuse has much to answer for as the
real cause of crime involving firearms. Through
marriage I have extended family in Louisiana & California
and they would no sooner identify with these criminals
than commit crime themselves. U.S. society has some
social/medical skeletons in its closet that it would
rather ignore and instead puts "firearms" on the altar of
accusation and conviction when the real guilt is abuse
of adult responsibilities by the easy acquisition and violent criminal use of a otherwise "innocent party".

Comment is about moving towards an unknown universe (blog)

the loss of culture as told through one mans life. even more poignant that he didn t seem to appreciate it while it was there. i have just written a piece about the same thing. lovely stuff.

Comment is about THE YARDS (blog)

Original item by ray pool

Hello RP - it's always a pleasure to read your stuff and
occasionally comment. I am impressed by your musical
background - and as a lyricist (with some published and
recorded songs as lyricist/tunesmith) I can identify with
the duality of your interests to date.
I came to writing words in lyric and poem form late in
life after a career in public service and found it both
enjoyable and liberating. My former work provided the
advantage of requiring discipline in formulating reports
and the need for a good vocabulary which I've found
most useful on WOL and in approaching the writing of
songs when it comes to a feeling for "what works"....
I hope!
Keep posting!
Cheers
Mark

Comment is about ray pool (poet profile)

Original item by ray pool

That's very nice to know and that my work hits the spot with you - particularly lovely that it is backed up by knowledge of the person writing it too!!
I'm quite inspired at the moment and I hope you are too - always reaching out and only as far in as is necessary for the source. Ray

Comment is about THE YARDS (blog)

Original item by ray pool

It's never "OK" for anyone to (or feel they have to) shoot
another. However, circumstances demand individual
assessment and my point was the readiness of the media
to "highlight" the actions of the forces of law and order
AND the respective racial identity of those concerned
when the victim was "black". This was notably absent
in that most recent case in Virginia. Indeed, the
racial aspect so readily taken up has been ignored
completely despite the slayer himself confessing its
relevance to his actions. Why? seems a pertinent
question. As for your mention of him being reported
as gay, this seems to add to my indictment of media
selectivity when it suits -and sells a story and its
prejudices.
Perhaps it should be mentioned in media reports just
many U.S. police officers are murdered or maimed in
the average year and the number of black offenders in prisons over there? Hundreds and thousands
respectively is an informed assessment. Is it any
wonder that individual cases involving police and public
deaths anywhere - let alone that gun-ridden land -
require an impartial and informed approach and not the
race-driven hysteria so frequently indulged in and used
by those whose with questionable agendas.
Cheers.

Comment is about HEADLINES (blog)

Original item by M.C. Newberry

Yes, Kitchen was excellent, but your sample piece I enjoyed also - I love the momentum and flow, an enviable asset. The subject is a well trodden road, but with a real insight free of bias. I am reminded of Christie Brown.

Comment is about Tom Harding (poet profile)

Original item by Tom Harding

Brilliant! And that ending had me laughing out loud.

Comment is about Bore (blog)

Oh I love the layout of this one! Another great find. Your words so true. The drop effects of the words leading to the overall pool for the reader to think on is excellent.

Comment is about Connotation (blog)

Original item by Cynthia Buell Thomas

I'm so glad I decided to putter about the site and found this. So powerful and sensual. And with just the right amount of sadness and longing I'm drawn to. I could see myself writing something like this. So very glad I found this!

Comment is about The Parting (blog)

Original item by Cynthia Buell Thomas

Simply put. Simply true.

Comment is about sonnet (blog)

Original item by Stuart Buck

Hey ray, cheers for your comments on 'kitchen' very nice to get such warm feedback- it was the first poem id finished in about six months!

Comment is about ray pool (poet profile)

Original item by ray pool

Hey laura thanks for your comments on 'kitchen' it was my first poem in awhile so nice to get some nice feedback!

Comment is about Laura Taylor (poet profile)

Original item by Laura Taylor

Thank you all!

Comment is about Kitchen (blog)

Original item by Tom Harding

Hey there MC, thanks ever so much for commenting on my recent offerings. It means a lot as I don't get that much feedback these days.

As for the stick, be careful with it MC you'll have somebody's eye out with it lol.

Stay well blue and thanks again.

x

Comment is about M.C. Newberry (poet profile)

Original item by M.C. Newberry

That last line hit home. Reconsider <shot through the heart>. I have similiar conversations with myself battling my narcissism and my egotism. Well, to thine own self be true and all that jazz. You definitely know yourself.

Comment is about The Velvet Conversation (blog)

Original item by Cynthia Buell Thomas

And the worst part was the cheap wine! What a bastard!

Comment is about Bore (blog)

Thanks so much Stu for the comment on 'Fake'. I sat on that one for awhile because I felt it was too inadequate...too lacking. I am thrilled you found it none of those things.

Comment is about Stuart Buck (poet profile)

Original item by Stuart Buck

So it's ok if the cops shoot a black man, just don't bother me with the information. The guy who shot the camera man and presenter was gay and that was not mentioned until today.

Comment is about HEADLINES (blog)

Original item by M.C. Newberry

dear MC thank you so much for your encouraging review of In the Valleys. Your opinion is always interesting and I am particularly pleased with this one as it feels like a sort of folk tale.

Comment is about M.C. Newberry (poet profile)

Original item by M.C. Newberry

dear MC thank you so much for your encouraging review of In the Valleys. Your opinion is always interesting and I am particularly pleased with this one as it feels like a sort of folk tale.

Comment is about M.C. Newberry (poet profile)

Original item by M.C. Newberry

Hi Corr - I'm a sucker for road movies and poems that reference highways and drifting through landscapes with intermingled images past and present - so thumbs up from me.

Comment is about 395 (blog)

Original item by Corr Lens

Thanks RM,

it could just as easily be Disunited Kingdom - we have our fair share of problems as do most countries these days.

you should take that last line - swim with it and see where it takes you - make it your own with my blessing.

Comment is about moving towards an unknown universe (blog)

Hi Nat,

Yes - you are right to say that - the last part from 'close your eyes' was something I'd been working on before I scribbled the top part last night. It's not my style to do poems inspired by the latest news stories which is why I linked them together and added the middle section.

I grew up in Shoreham, knew almost every inch of the place and its surrounds, crossed the junction (where the plane came down) on countless occasions. It struck me that someone in Virginia would now know about Shoreham as I would now know Virginia, both for different but similarly tragic reasons. I wanted to bring that into the piece by showing how our lives are subconsciously(?) interconnected.

The 'close your eyes' bit is simply me being my usual self - wanting to escape and block out reality.

The ending is a throwaway line to be interpreted as you like although - for me - it alludes to a photo of a beach I saw recently.

I hope that makes some sense Nat - thanks for taking the time to read and comment - much appreciated.

Comment is about moving towards an unknown universe (blog)

Disunited America. So perfectly labeled. Still have fresh tears from seeing the news report. No amount of surf will erase the sounds of her screams. Sunshine therapy today.

' your silhouette

a dolphin dive' made me smile. Another line I am envious is not mine.

Comment is about moving towards an unknown universe (blog)

Having recently acquired the use of a stick through necessity, I read this with some interest and identification!
But I relish the thought of fending off importunate passers-
by with it when and if the need arises. :-))

Comment is about Adventurous, Forthright, Calamitous, Old! (blog)

Original item by Noetic-fret!

This taps into a current taste for treating cyclists with
"why don't they get out of my way"...and things will not
improve as the surging population with their surging
families seek to fill the roads with gas-guzzlers to
accommodate their blank-faced broods and their all-too frequent travels.
In fairness, I confess to a vested interest insofar that I
cycled most of my adult life - here in central London - and
I own a car. Having taken two tumbles in recent years -
one when I was knocked off by a carelessly opened driver's
door and the other via a sudden front wheel puncture -
I sustained injury which has seen me obliged to sell the bike. But I can still view the world from both "seats"
when out on the road and it helps.

Comment is about Wheels (blog)

Original item by Ian Gant

Like a great song, this tells its tale via imagery and
a knowing connection to the mundane things in life with
a combination of precision and profundity. Some memorable lines add to the pleasure.

Comment is about IN THE VALLEYS (blog)

Original item by ray pool

A lovely sense of the ridiculous - and I agree with NT about
its possibilities in a children's story book.

Comment is about THE BALLAD OF THE BALD HEDGEHOG (blog)

Original item by THE PEN AND THE PAGE

Thanks, gentlemen, for the feedback. Some people will find such a poem boring to the nth degree. I can't help how I'm wired. If I pretend I'm not like this, I'll soon sound phoney and pathetic. It's always super wonderful to find a kindred soul willing even to read the piece, let alone comment on it.

I believe Reason must supersede Passion for the sheer purpose of Survival. I also think the 'masters' of the world deliberately create and stoke 'passion' as a serious controlling technique, as, for example, the so-called Beauty Industry or Kamikazi philosophy. (Not sure of that spelling, but you know the word.)

Comment is about The Velvet Conversation (blog)

Original item by Cynthia Buell Thomas

love this, just came home from a mountain, id like to buy one myself.

Comment is about Mountain (blog)

oh my fuck, i think this is my favorite so far, so clearly up my alley.

Comment is about Bore (blog)

I would agree, Harry. But unfortunately a minority stereotype us all. It would help if we saw more Germans and French and Spanish etc being sick in the streets; but it always seems the poorly person is wearing Union Jack shorts.
I suppose you're right guys and it's just a sign of me getting old and more curmudgeonly.
Thanks for posting, Harry, Raypool and MC.

Comment is about DIPSO FATSO BINGO ASBO TESCO (blog)

Original item by John Coopey

Sometimes love has to be sacrificed for the sake of having a decent life....x

Comment is about Nigel Astell (poet profile)

Original item by Nigel Astell

i just made that up by the way in case you think ive lost my talent...

Comment is about ray pool (poet profile)

Original item by ray pool

no problem, its a great poem. jarvis cocker should perform it, that would be something. those sultry yorkshire tones just drip the kind of smut you wrote about. as for bukowski, its his last line trick i love so much. its easy to do;
i lay beside her
heaving and panting
she sighed forever
while outside the azaleas wept
but difficult to master (my version above proving this...)
it just transforms the mundane into something wondrous.

Comment is about ray pool (poet profile)

Original item by ray pool

Well thanks so much Stu. I just followed my imagination and peppered it with a bit of spice. I do seedy quite well!
Something about Wales seems to be give it credibility not to mention Yul Brynner of course. Great to be compared with Bukowski !

Comment is about Stuart Buck (poet profile)

Original item by Stuart Buck

Hi Ray,
Thanks for your feedback on 'The Wonderful Irony'-it has been brewing in my brain ever since I discovered that particular set of circumstances-and fell out of my pencil in one mad burst last night.

Comment is about ray pool (poet profile)

Original item by ray pool

I have put pen to use in newspapers about the way the
terms "England" and "English" have been largely ignored,
except to be denigrated and mocked in my EU lifetime,
whilst "Scottish" "Welsh" and "Irish" seem to be
promoted and eulogised at every opportunity.
"British" has become the favoured descriptive term - no
doubt to help ease the sense of belonging of those who
have arrived here (mostly in England) from elsewhere.
You can be most kinds of shit
When you can call yourself a Brit.

Comment is about DIPSO FATSO BINGO ASBO TESCO (blog)

Original item by John Coopey

this is very good. veined porcelain hand is excellent, as is the near-haikuesqueness (surely not a word) throughout. very emotive and easily conjures up a lovely image.

Comment is about Burnham Beeches with Anna, 1985 (blog)

Original item by John E Marks

this is completely brilliant ray. so many surreal and sensual images, so much humour and small town/time talk, the line scent and lust in suspension is fantastic, the third verse is genius all the way through, especially the bukowski-esque last line (seriously, i love this changing of the scene but keeping the meaning in the last line), the mundanity of the bed making mirroring the lives. genius man.

Comment is about IN THE VALLEYS (blog)

Original item by ray pool

I guess it's being in the wrong place at the wrong time that helps form this image, John. I suppose we have to blame cheap airline travel , and if those places wish to cater for them commercially, its par for the course. Sad.
Anyway, I love the rollicking style with the last lines hammering home the message!!

Comment is about DIPSO FATSO BINGO ASBO TESCO (blog)

Original item by John Coopey

John , first time I've read your poems. This is poignant and lovely and so simple . Well done.

Comment is about Burnham Beeches with Anna, 1985 (blog)

Original item by John E Marks

A whole way of life in four lines. Well done Stu.

Comment is about hokey cokey (blog)

Original item by Stuart Buck