Dk it looks you been bit slack
Letting screens get holes
For little flies to buzz right in
And on your wife, make goal ?

Comment is about The Wrath Of Wives (blog)

Original item by d.knape

I'm with Sophie Cait. And I stick with my original comment. I like it.....

Comment is about #11 (blog)

Original item by Cait Abbott

haha that's a nice idea mindy Newton
I agree it's quite a cruel ending
but I believe in the afterlife
they will all be up there jamming with no earthly burdens attatched xx

Comment is about The Band With Five Hands (blog)

Original item by Sarah Louise mcnee

Very sad but so well written

Comment is about a life shorter than a day (blog)

Original item by Sarah Louise mcnee

That poem is amazing! I adore your work xxx

Comment is about The Band With Five Hands (blog)

Original item by Sarah Louise mcnee

If you are reading my mind, I want you to sign a non-disclosure agreement!

Painful yet funny poem. Tolerant of our foibles, and thus hopeful!

Also good to read.

Comment is about My Half-Life (blog)

Original item by Robert C Gaulke

Apparently phonology has nothing to do with language and poetry now ahhahahahaha

Comment is about #11 (blog)

Original item by Cait Abbott

This has rhythm but it also has assonance. "coUld", "blossOm, "UndEr", "yOUr", "Us" "thEm"
These all make the same vowel sound (uh) which is very impressive because includes the vast majority of the words in the poem. It means that it reads aloud as a poem because acoustically alone it conveys a softness and romance, and the repeated sound makes it sound like the writer is fixedly thinking about one thing (because of the one repeated noise)-love.
I hope my English language knowledge has helped enlighten a bit
Still love this poem Cait! I think it's beautiful
x

Comment is about #11 (blog)

Original item by Cait Abbott

WOW! What an express train followed after my humble beginning.

The comments were interesting and helpful I hope to all WOLers.
The point made that we are communicating online and not physically together in the same room which can sometimes lead to misunderstandings is important. We need to be mindful of this at all times.

Cait - the bottom line is you write for yourself. My view? If others like my work fine. If not? - still fine.

Oh, and to be a poem, definition says it must have rhythm. Which yours has.

Comment is about #11 (blog)

Original item by Cait Abbott

I like the tone and flavour of this. Kind of bitter-sweet. And the strong connection to Nature. Well done!

Comment is about The Poem of the Week is 'Now Birds Ravage The Cherries' by Devon Brock (article)

Original item by Stuart Buck

Thanks for reading and commenting on my poem.
Always good to hear from the cool Raypool!

Comment is about ray pool (poet profile)

Original item by ray pool

Hi Cait. I suppose the reaction you have here is a sort of baptism of fire - but ultimately we are open to the vagaries of the system. Like the weather there are times when readers are drawn in, and times when nothing seems to gain attention. Being of long standing, I can vouch for both. The irony with #11 is the brevity of it attracting so many words . I feel that here is an example of the reader swallowing a pill of a message, quickly and the effect is immediate. I honestly don't know what the title indicates, but that may be because of my ignorance - don't know!
Quite often political poems get long comments , and it seems you have entered the fray of controversy. I usually move to the humour switch under such conditions. Most comments I have found switch their focus on to the attitudes of the readers rather than on the poem. For me, this one of yours does have a thought form that opens up possibilities.

With respect (naturally). Ray

Comment is about #11 (blog)

Original item by Cait Abbott

Hi Cait

It wasn't criticism or opinion. I asked you two questions. Whilst I take Graham's point about haiku, they can be incredibly dense and complex poems with many layers, and there are rules to be followed.

Also, I wasn't 'struggling to understand' it. I would struggle to see how anyone would struggle to understand it, tbh.

I'm loath to offer anything else at this point, given your remarks about criticism. I can understand that. When I first started writing and posting on here, I was also very defensive. However, over the years, that rubbed off, and I began to filter and accept certain things that I thought might improve my writing. Not all of it, but some, and I improved because of it.

I wish you well. Keep thinking, and certainly don't stop writing.

Comment is about #11 (blog)

Original item by Cait Abbott

Thank you all for you forthcoming advice and comments. I understand your position entirely. I purely view my writing as an extension of myself and so criticism or what is said online often feels very personal. Regardless of another person’s viewpoint I will continue to do what I enjoy.

I agree with you both David and Jason. I believe it may simply be a question of how one welcomes criticism. Perhaps that is the difference of face to face contact versus online comments?

However, I am 19. I still have a lot to learn and abstaining from allowing criticism to impact me is something I am yet to learn.

With all love and respect, thank you

Comment is about #11 (blog)

Original item by Cait Abbott

Thanks for your always insightful comments Ray. T.

Comment is about SHADOWS (blog)

Original item by trevor homer

Hi Cait, I liked it a couple of days ago and didn't have time to comment, and much like everyone else, I really like it.
David is right though, about criticism.
I don't mind people having an honest, critical debate about anything I write, it's a good way to learn, but when it comes to others work I tend not to. I think,

1) I'm not educated enough to offer criticism on form and structure.

2) I think it just feels a bit mean, which is silly really, because as long as it's constructive it might be valuable.

If I don't like something, I tend to just not comment or like at all, which again is silly.

At work I have to tell very difficult people what to do, a lot, so I don't have a problem with that, I think that might be the issue though.

I know for me personally, if we were all in the same room, face to face, I be much more happy talk like this because in that environment all of the body language, facial expressions and tone of voice would be easy to see. Whereas like this, in text all of that's lost and I think that can lead to misunderstandings and the belief that someone is having a pop at you
Hope that makes sense??

J. x

Comment is about #11 (blog)

Original item by Cait Abbott

Thank you, Sophie.

e. xxx

Comment is about upon waking (for the first time) (blog)

Original item by Eiren Water

Yeh. Devon. Apparently in Appalachia the accent is close to that of C17 London. Many of the Jamestown-Virginia colonists originated in the slums of London that Dickens was later to write about. Also many of the folk songs from that part of north America are/were alive long after their demise in old England. Interesting also, that James Joyce was a Dubliner and many Catholic Dubliners were descended not from Celts and Gaels but from the Old English, English settlers who had lived in the Pale, the area around Dublin, during Plantaganet times.

Comment is about The bringer of plurabilities (blog)

Original item by John E Marks

Damn that was fun to read. Ok, so what really grabs me is "downa". Where is the use of "downa" prevalent? Where I am from, initially, Maryland, we use "downa" a lot..."downa shore, downa Camden, etc.". The reason I ask is that this may give some clue as to how certain dialectical idiosyncrasies survive in the States as evidence of the origins of the first colonists. And damn, that was fun to read.

D

Comment is about The bringer of plurabilities (blog)

Original item by John E Marks

I like the last two lines....

Comment is about Sister (blog)

Original item by Mel Shield

May I introduce you to MY sister?

Miracle-worker and story-teller all in one!

Well done, well done!

Comment is about Sister (blog)

Original item by Mel Shield

Death like space, the final frontier for us all. Some of us have been to the mountain top and stared death in the face, only to come down again on a stretcher. As to the departed we know not yet what they faced, but we do know the Grace in which they are held by those closest to them. And may you find your solace in the writing of it. Blessings. P. ?

Comment is about Death (blog)

Original item by Lisa C Bassignani

Thanks Leon. Some poems you choose to write; others you have to write; this was one of them

Comment is about No country for young men (blog)

Original item by John E Marks

Thank you Jason Z.! I'm glad you liked that one, it's one of my favorite lines in the piece ?
Mae

Comment is about The Summer of my Dismay (Volume 27) (blog)

Original item by Mae Foreman

Great work, Mae!

"Steadily the manicured hand wields a plastic holy cross

bathed in diet coke."

My favorite line in your poem. Humorous and powerful simultaneously. Nice.

Comment is about The Summer of my Dismay (Volume 27) (blog)

Original item by Mae Foreman

No, there is no suspense here at all!

A Pumblechookian monster will be shervished by any half-way competent halberd-bearer loyal to the crown!

Surrender not! No, never surrender!

Fear is the ticking of a clock. The dawning of a day. The passage of the sun.
Fear is the growth of hunger, the resurfacing of thirst. Fear is time unplanned for....

Fear fears the planning of a day. Even that. Shervish fear forever!!!

Comment is about branwell kent (poet profile)

Original item by branwell kent

Excellent!!!!! Very good! Three balloons good!!!
Thank you???
Mae

Comment is about Norfolk (blog)

Original item by branwell kent

So so good! Bravo! And oh so much fun happening in the comment section!!!
Oh you all brilliant people ?
Mae

Comment is about An Obsession With Adverbs (blog)

Original item by branwell kent

Thank you Dorothy!?
Mae

Comment is about The Summer of my Dismay (Volume 27) (blog)

Original item by Mae Foreman

Thanks Devon! Really, "wow"? Thanks so much!?
Mae

Comment is about The Summer of my Dismay (Volume 27) (blog)

Original item by Mae Foreman

Wow, Mae - just wow. All that and and intense rhythm to boot.

D

Comment is about The Summer of my Dismay (Volume 27) (blog)

Original item by Mae Foreman

Thank you all for stopping by and leaving your thoughts on this. I appreciate your comments. I think this one sounds great via audio but when I read through it in my head now it doesn't seem to flow well towards the end ?

Not sure if I should edit it in the near future???

Comment is about Some Mother's Son (blog)

Original item by Emer Ní Chorra

Martin - thank you, yes it has its point ? but I guess you guessed that!

Tom - and thank you for your point and comment?

Mindy - and thank you too, I did'nt feel thepain till you nudged me. -so to speak.

Ta folks xxx

Comment is about Martin Elder (poet profile)

Original item by Martin Elder

Stole my heart and then broke it?Beautiful and painful.
Thank you ?
Mae

Comment is about the passing of a king (blog)

Original item by Charles Schlee

Martin - thank you, yes it has its point ? but I guess you guessed that!

Tom - and thank you for your point and comment? It's most wellcome.

Mindy - and thank you too, I did'nt feel thepain till you nudged me. -so to speak.

Ta folks xxx

Comment is about Tom (poet profile)

Original item by Tom

Martin - thank you, yes it has its point ? but I guess you guessed that!

Tom - and thank you for your point and comment?

Mindy - and thank you too, I did'nt feel thepain till you nudged me. -so to speak.

Ta folks xxx

Comment is about Did you brush it from your hair? (blog)

Original item by Tommy Carroll

I have been browsing your work, Sophie. I love your style... blunt, direct and powerful verbal punches. Looking forward to reading more! Take care.

Comment is about Sophie (poet profile)

Original item by Sophie

So, are we to discover next that you are addicted to adjectives, partial to participles, generous with gerunds, perverse to prepositions, venal with verbs, a serial comma abuser, a registered noun-offender, or what?

You can do it, Branwell, I know you've got it in you!

Comment is about An Obsession With Adverbs (blog)

Original item by branwell kent

Reminds me of a surgery I had in my urinary tract! Very relate-able to me..... nice work!

Comment is about WAITING - FOR URINATION (blog)

Original item by ray pool

Thank you so much for the kind words Eiren! It's what I see...?
Thank you for stopping by?
Mae

Comment is about The Summer of my Dismay (Volume 27) (blog)

Original item by Mae Foreman

Wow, Mae! This is really beautifully poignant. Your images are rich with minutia that really pulls me into the scenes. I love it. Thanks for sharing this.

e. xxx

Comment is about The Summer of my Dismay (Volume 27) (blog)

Original item by Mae Foreman

Congrats on another POTW, Devon. Great work!

Comment is about The Poem of the Week is 'Now Birds Ravage The Cherries' by Devon Brock (article)

Original item by Stuart Buck

Thanks for sharing, this was really fun to read out loud. I am a bit of a list lover and this tickled me in just the right way.

Comment is about An Obsession With Adverbs (blog)

Original item by branwell kent

Choose her meaningfully,
Place her grammatically,
Replace her reluctantly,
Embed her lovingly.

Talk about a giant can of worms!
Fun poem!

P.S. I Don't think that owl likes me.

Comment is about An Obsession With Adverbs (blog)

Original item by branwell kent

Thanks, MC.

Comment is about NO BETTER ENDING (blog)

Original item by John Coopey

unbelievably amazed how you have dealt with such a difficult subject

Comment is about No country for young men (blog)

Original item by John E Marks

Thank you Jason, I'd argue that was even better aha! X

Comment is about In the shower (blog)

Original item by Sophie

I offer up more "oohs" and "ahs,"
Than does our Dr. Don,
Whose neat black bag is wont to sag,
Topped up with loud guffaws.

Comment is about Chuckle Therapy (blog)

Original item by Don Matthews

Beautiful x

Comment is about upon waking (for the first time) (blog)

Original item by Eiren Water

Laughter is the best...
Sure to add some zest...
Put it to the test...
Cures a fallen crest!

Comment is about Chuckle Therapy (blog)

Original item by Don Matthews