Hi Peter,
this is so sporadically profound, it's difficult to define but i sense this is the main characteristic of the poem.
I love the sheer depth of it, but especially the last two lines in the finale. They say it all for me.

Great mastery of a subject given too little thought to and one which is as true now as it was in times of war.

Janet.x

Comment is about ambrosia to the ears (blog)

Hi Pete

Another roller-coaster of a piece. I'm going to get my boots and little helmet from out the shed. It's time to go pot-holing inside this poem. I'll let you know what I find...?

Comment is about ambrosia to the ears (blog)

Hi Steve,
thanks for your comment on my poem,
'pondering' the back yard'
Yes it reminds me of my picking the seeds with a pin too. Got the holes in my tongue to prove it.

Janet.x

Comment is about Steve Regan (poet profile)

Original item by Steve Regan

"confused,but clarity calls to seduce me one more time"

punchy n speed
good rap

like the desperation in this Yosh.

Comment is about UNTITLED 3 (blog)

A fantastic honour to join you on stage Steve!
Poetry (for me) is all about passionate performance, good writing and mostly having fun, as that makes you live longer. I am no page poet, no critique, I just know what I see and like, you being an instant hit.

regards
P

Comment is about Steve Regan (poet profile)

Original item by Steve Regan

Congratulations and well done ! I was very sad I couldn't make it esp as I was a contestant too. Never mind - next time

Comment is about Louise Fazackerly at the Bolton Slam, Octagon Theatre, March 2009 (photo)

Nice flow and rhyming.
Interesting twist at the end... but sad.

Comment is about There's Another Person Leaving (blog)

Original item by George Stanworth

Nice... interesting with all the Tick-Click's...
I like that each line is direct...
I could visualise this quite well.

Comment is about that night (blog)

Original item by alan barlow

moon your arse to mars :)

i promise if i get the chance , if the car comes by me . pixilate that !!

Comment is about the google camera car is coming (blog)

Thanks for your recent comment Simon. It makes sense.

Comment is about Simon Rennie (poet profile)

Original item by Simon Rennie

Pete, that's a great one; like John said, intimate and touching. It's about "love", I'd say, though you don't use that word in it, only "lover". The piece also illuminates the nature of being human - which is one of the great themes of poetry, and of philosophy. Hope you will perform it at the Tudor.

Comment is about something to celebrate (blog)

I wish you well Mr Crompton, I wish you well.

Comment is about something to celebrate (blog)

Good stuff Peter.

Intimate, touching.

Like the lines:

I like to beat
your radiated heat
into the world of me

and

you are valuable
I am ply and malleable
for you forming the spoon

Look forward to hearing it some day.

Comment is about something to celebrate (blog)

Must agree - it was really an excellent night. Although competitive the atmosphere was great and poets were well supported. Felt a bit sorry for Louise having to go first (I know its hard because I did in my first slam at Wigan).

Well done all especially the winner who was superb and the organisers.

Photos now in galleries

Comment is about Michael Wilson is the Write Out Loud 2009 Bolton Slam Champ! (article)

Good poem,well presented. We hold identical views Gary.

Comment is about 'Barbed Wire Freedom' (blog)

Photos by me

Comment is about Degsy Jones comperes at the Everyman Theatre, Liverpool April 2009 (photo)

well written mate, maybe one day the ship
will sink, lets hope there's dry land when it does!

Comment is about ANOTHER DAY ON THE SLAVESHIP.. (blog)

I can feel the sadness... beautifully written...

Comment is about 'Free As A Bird' (blog)

Expresses a hopeless feeling...
These lines in particular I find sad:

'I was not to know, what love would mean to me.'

'Crying so much, that I would drown, in my own emotional pool.'

I find your painting very colourful and interesting...

Comment is about 'Invasion Of Space' (blog)

thanks for the comments ladies it was one of my first "serious" pieces from a couple of months ago.

and sian everything gets easier with time not that we realise it all of the time, more so now its "out there"

Comment is about that night (blog)

Original item by alan barlow

Hi There

Enjoyed reading The Commuters here. Couldn't really concentrate on it at the slam the other night.

Great stuff

Winston

Comment is about Louise Fazackerley (poet profile)

Original item by Louise Fazackerley

Yes, Liked this one Christopher... I have been there too. To fight for justice... but on this particular day the judge was busy elsewhere! trial postponed (what a crazy system) Winston

Comment is about Court out (blog)

Original item by Christopher Dawson

Photographs by Seamus Kelly www.shaysart.co.uk
If anyone wants a full size copy of their image Seamus will be happy to email it to them if they contact him on mail@shaysart.co.uk

Comment is about Louise Fazackerly at the Bolton Slam, Octagon Theatre, March 2009 (photo)

I am merged with dullness and deepest grey,
I am purged of useful words to say.

Worth the money for those two lines Sian. Time to look forward? Graham

Comment is about This (blog)

Original item by sian howell

There are some wonderful lines in this poem.
The ending is quite stark and startling.
Love the painting too :-)

Janet.x

Comment is about 'Free As A Bird' (blog)

Lovely.

Janet.x

Comment is about 'Driftwood Parasols & Seaweed Trees' (blog)

Hi Pete
1 am addicted to Cadburys Chocolate fingers. Every trip to the supermarkets they call to me as I enter the store. Its a none stop feast.
Good poem.

Comment is about Cadburys 'Snaps' (blog)

Christopher,how true. A realtime episode played out almost daily. Well done.

Comment is about Court out (blog)

Original item by Christopher Dawson

Hi Alan,
Good stuff.
It even captured the deadly stillness of the night before ' a distant wail creeps over the horizon, and then screaming lights and horrified faces'

Really good.
Janet.x

Comment is about that night (blog)

Original item by alan barlow

aww, the ending is so, so sad.
I've done jury service and know this happens.
Very rhythmic poem and a good read.
I hesitate to use the word enjoyable because of the subject matter :-)

Janet.x

Comment is about Court out (blog)

Original item by Christopher Dawson

Hi Steve, cheers for comment, glad you like those lines, was dead chuffed when I came up with them!

We sing from the same hymn sheet mate! see ya soon, Jeff

Comment is about Steve O'Connor (poet profile)

Original item by Steve O'Connor

Hi Dan, thanks for comment, it was a bit nerve wracking but the gigs I have done have helped. Get a few more poetry nights in then go for it!

Comment is about Daniel Hooks (poet profile)

Original item by Daniel Hooks

Hi Gary,
I love the third stanza in this poem, it stands out from the rest for my liking and i like the " I don't want to believe lines too."
(have to admit to leaving that particular bit out after the first line in each stanza though) :-)

Welcome to the site, hope you enjoy it here.
Janet.x

Comment is about 'A Glass Of Bourbon With Brando' (blog)

Hi Alan, thanks so much for your comments on my piece..."This"- a bit painful to write but there you go, it's out now and not inside churning around. The whole 'car crash' scene of your piece is graphic and vivid and conveys the sheer destruction not only of the vehicles but the lives of the people inside them. Great stuff. Sian X

Comment is about that night (blog)

Original item by alan barlow

Mmmmmm.....
Scrumptious!
Have you tried the chocolate hazelnut cadbury snaps? Love the mint but you just can't beat nutty ones. Hm :-)

I'll look forward to hearing this one performed Peter 'cos i kept getting my tongue in a twist just trying to read it. Good 'un my lovely.
Janet.x

Comment is about Cadburys 'Snaps' (blog)

i like this poem , with a moan like thunder self harming . that line is going to travel with me :)

Comment is about PURPLE (blog)

Original item by Dominic Berry

I have the same problem ... only with Garibaldi biscuits. Just can't stop stuffing 'em down me screech once the box is opened. Still, one must never stop opening boxes.

Comment is about Cadburys 'Snaps' (blog)

aaahh, can sleep now, cheers dom!
i wasnt having the happiest of days at it happens, but your purple poem has cheered me right up. grrrrrr, its bloody delicious.
you are acecakes mister xxxx

Comment is about Dominic Berry (poet profile)

Original item by Dominic Berry

thanks muchly for your comment val, had a rootle around your page and glad you've got loads of stuff up to get me teeth into, i've really enjoyed having a read of everything, especially Good Mother- it made me sad and happy, happysad, if you will. bestest, sally xx

Comment is about Valerie Cook (poet profile)

Original item by Valerie Cook

thank eeee for your kind words anthony. i've posted the link for the song on me profile...im a hillbilly at heart! hope you likes.
also, the doomsday man is bloomin majestic! bestest, sally xx

Comment is about Anthony Emmerson (poet profile)

Original item by Anthony Emmerson

eeeee, winston please put dates up for gig you've got coming up! distressing to see ones that have been and gone.... i love hebden bridge AND your poesy. sally xx

Comment is about Winston Plowes (poet profile)

Original item by Winston Plowes

i like this Freda .

Comment is about On a Field Azure (blog)

Original item by Freda Davis

Wey Hey, Well done on coming 4th in the slam.. proud of you babe. xxxx

Comment is about Jeffarama! (poet profile)

Original item by Jeffarama!

Thanks for your comment about 'IT Support' Winston. I am always looking at improving my work and I agree the ending could be a bit punchier. I really enjoyed reading your poem 'Decree Ni'si'. It has some great imagery in it and evokes powerful emotions.
George

Comment is about Winston Plowes (poet profile)

Original item by Winston Plowes

well done on coming runner up in the bolton poetry slam! I want to enter a slam one day I hope I will guts someday and will get over my monotone voice!

Comment is about Jeffarama! (poet profile)

Original item by Jeffarama!

This not only write out loud's popularity but performance poetry in general there are not enough websites like this one and write out loud's owners/organisational chiefs could do with more funding to achieve its aims
THE SKY IS THE LIMIT FOR PERFORMANCE POETRY!

Comment is about March Stats (blog)

This is wonderful and I especially like the structure as I am attracted to poems that have been thought out in form and structure.

You write well :)

Comment is about 'Free As A Bird' (blog)

Loveit ! love it! it's a great poem and I am even more delighted to see that a guy has chosen this - female psyche : ) Thank you Andy!

Comment is about Learning To Kiss (article)

Congratulations to all and of course our worthy champion Michael.

Guiness was in bottles... Rubbish stuff ... try to arrange draught....well it is good for you!

Great night.

Gus

Comment is about Michael Wilson is the Write Out Loud 2009 Bolton Slam Champ! (article)

Congratulations!!! Nice to speak to you over a fag.

Comment is about michael wilson (poet profile)

Original item by michael wilson